Full Service Broker Comic Strips - Page 9

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

309 Results for Full Service Broker

View 81 - 90 results for full service broker comic strips. Discover the best "Full Service Broker" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #accounting, #expense figures, #base ten, #counting system, #full range, #odds and even, #hp printer ink, #finance troll

View Transcript

Transcript

"Accounting" "Can you explain these expense figures?" "It's a base ten accounting system with a full range of odd and even digits." "This isn't helping." "Tastes like hp printer ink... high gloss paper, four hours old."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #objectives are vague, #unmeasurable, #not inspired, #achieve full ptential, #bad job

View Transcript

Transcript

"I am concerned because my objectivess are vague and unmeasurable." "As a result, I am not inspired to achieve my full potential... and... um..." "Did I just say I'm doing a bad job and ask you to punish me?" "That's what I heard."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #combined, #dating service, #online job site, #system

View Transcript

Transcript

"I combined an online dating service with an online job site and an online auction site." "You tell the system everything about yourself and see if anyone wants any of it." ""I wouldn't date you or hire you, but I'll bid a dollar for your refrigerator.""

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #chapter 23, #photo copy, #see how yourself, #books, #full of information, #Entertainment

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss approaches Dilbert with a book in hand. The Boss says, "Let's see.. your defects are discussed in chapter 23." The Boss continues, "I'll give you a photocopy so you can see how to fix it yourself." As The Boss walks away, he thinks, "Books are full of information."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #open art gallery, #full bar, #putrid art, #specialize, #synergy

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: I plan to open an art gallery with a full bar. "I'll specialize in putrid art that's unreasonably priced." "Synergy" "Thash so bee-oo-tiful!!!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bad service, #fire people, #sexy, #ceo of company

View Transcript

Transcript

I keep getting bad service at stores. "Do what I do."<br."I say I'm the CEO of their company and then I fire them all." "You don't look like a CEO." "Too sexy?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cable company, #abusive service windows, #regis and kelly

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: "I'm going to work for the cable company." Dilbert: "Why?" Dogbert: "I enjoy giving people abusive service windows." Dilbert: "Oh" Dogbert: "Well, if you can't be home from March to October, then say goodbye to Regis and Kelly!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #don't sit by popel, #full flight, #suitcase, #overhead comaprtment, #bin, #scotch over

View Transcript

Transcript

"Your seat is next to mine, but I don't like to sit by people." "It's a full flight, so I don't see how I could...oh dear..." "No, I wll not 'scooch over.'" "News!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #sourpuss, #wast of time, #drum, #half full

View Transcript

Transcript

Sourpuss "Whatever you're doing there looks like a complete waste of time." "If you beat your head against the wall, that doesn't make it a drum." "People say the glass is half full. But they don't say of what."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #employee orientation, #no time, #exercise, #long hours, #trans fat, #positive note, #payroll dedcution, #service, #save money, #dirt, #cubicle, #burial site, #health

View Transcript

Transcript

Employee Orientation Catbert: "This job will leave you with no time for exercise." "You will work long hours and consume trans fats until you are shaped like this." "On a positive note, our payroll deduction service allows you to save money for dirt to turn your cubicle into a burial site."