Great News Comic Strips - Page 9
504 Results for Great News
View 81 - 90 results for great news comic strips. Discover the best "Great News" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share July 27, 2004's comic on:
"Hey, Dilbert! How would you like to go to lunch?" "Alone." "Alone! Ha ha! but then you'd miss out on this great opportunity!" "It's multi-level marketing plus a diet plan suggested by the bible!" "Shoot me."
Share August 17, 2004's comic on:
"Product designer" Dogbert: "Function means nothing. Design is everything." "Quality is yesterday's news. Today we focus on the emotional impact of the product." Dilbert: "But it still needs quality, right?" Dogbert: "You are so-o-o-o hard to look at."
Share August 20, 2004's comic on:
"Product designer" "The new product is selling like crazy, thanks to it's great design." "Sales" "It's so attractive that people over look its minor flaws in functionality." "For example, it accuses the user of sex crimes whenever company comes over." "And it's cute!"
Share July 23, 2012's comic on:
Boss: I just thought of a great idea for increasing workplace productivity. Carol: Does it involve standing near my workplace and yammering while I try to work? Boss: Geez. Who salted the Earth? Carol: Your plan is going great so far.
Share August 12, 2012's comic on:
Wally: Here's a list of the twelve elements of great managing. If you do everything on that list, it will make me feel what experts call "engaged." If you fail to do your job properly, I will feel all disengaged and do poor work. This would be a convenient time to give me some praise and recognition. You might also want to encourage my development and tell me my job is important. Remember to care about me as a person and tell me my opinions count. If you do all of that, plus seven more things on the list, you might get some productivity out of me. Boss: Leave my office and drop dead. Wally: Will that help me learn and grow?
Share October 22, 2004's comic on:
Share November 09, 2004's comic on:
The Boss: The government says we have to put warning labels on our forty thousand calorie, shard -filled doughnuts prodcut. Dogbert: How about: warning! this product will kill you but thats okay because it tastes great! Police: It looks like he chocked on some sort of warning label.
Share January 07, 2005's comic on:
The Boss: "Our new strategy is to sell fewer units at higher margins." Dilbert: "Question: How's that different from saying our sales stink, so we're cutting costs?" The Boss: "I call it a strategy so you won't lose hope." Dilbert: "It's working great."
Share March 10, 2005's comic on:
Wally: "Have you ever noticed that the things that don't kill you make you weaker?" "And great minds don't think alike. If they did, the patent office would only have about fifty inventions." "I started getting suspicious when I cried over spilt milk and the cashier took it off my bill"
Share March 25, 2005's comic on:
Dilbert: "I'm the victim of an ugly rumor at work." Dogbert: "Are you saying that the rumor is ugly or that the rumor is that you're ugly?"<Br>"I'm saying the rumor itself is ugly."<Br>"Well, then I have more bad news for you."