Hate Automatically Comic Strips - Page 9
245 Results for Hate Automatically
View 81 - 90 results for hate automatically comic strips. Discover the best "Hate Automatically" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share May 02, 1991's comic on:
Dogbert sits in a chair and Ratbert sits on the hassock. Ratbert says, "There's a terrible stigma to being a rat . . ." Ratbert continues, "I once painted a pouch on my stomach and told people I was a tiny kangaroo." Ratbert continues, "That's when I found out that people hate tiny kangaroos."
Share July 20, 1991's comic on:
Dogbert sees Ratbert lying on the sidewalk. Dogbert says, "Ratbert! What happened to you?" Ratbert sits up and replies, "My Chihuahua disguise worked. I've been taunted and chased all day by bigots who hate Chihuahuas for no reason." Ratbert says, "There's an important lesson in this." Dogbert asks, "What? Chihuahuas are evil?"
Share August 10, 1991's comic on:
Dilbert sits in his chair thinking, "I hate it when my dog just stares at me." Dilbert thinks, "Is he plotting? Does hoe know something I don't? What is it?" Dogbert looks at Dilbert through a pair of binoculars. Dogbert thinks, "Dogs don't like to talk about it, but the instinct to look up people's noses is very strong."
Share July 10, 2012's comic on:
Dogbert: I've decided to become a venture capitalist. I'll take money from the rich and give it to hopelessly doomed social media start-ups. Dilbert: Because you love helping entrepreneurs? Dogbert: Because I hate rich people who aren't me.
Share September 05, 1991's comic on:
A caption identifies a young man as a "worried teenager." Dogbert approaches the teenager on the sidewalk and asks, "What's wrong with you?" The boy replies, "WOOD . . . What happens if we cut down all the trees?? We'll have to declare war on Norway and take their wood! I'll be drafted! I hate fiords." Dogbert yells, "Pimple attack!" A huge pimple sprouts on the boy's face.
Share February 25, 1992's comic on:
Dilbert and Dogbert sit at the table. Dilbert says, "I'm concerned that you might be running for President for the wrong reasons . . ." Dilbert asks, "Are you doing it for ego gratification, power, and wealth?" Dogbert replies, "Yes." Dilbert shakes his finger at Dogbert and says, "Well, those are all the wrong reasons." Dogbert says, "Of course, I'll tell the ignorant masses that it's because I hate big government."
Share April 29, 1992's comic on:
Dilbert hands the Boss a report and says, "Here's my report. It's some of my best work." The Boss puts the report through a portable shredder that is hanging around his neck. Dilbert says, "I hate that porto-shredder." The Boss asks, "Say, is that a silk necktie?"
Share May 07, 1992's comic on:
Dogbert sits on a pillow thinking, "I've made little progress toward my goal of being supreme ruler of earth." Dogbert thinks, "Obviously it's not my fault. Somebody else must be to blame." Dogbert stares at Dilbert who is sitting at his desk. Dilbert thinks, "I hate it when he just stares."
Share July 28, 1992's comic on:
Dogbert hands Bob the Dinosaur a publication and says, "Bob, here's a copy of my new newsletter for clueless people." Bob reads, "Dogbert's Clues for the Clueless: 1. Professional wrestling is all faked. 2. Nobody ever lost weight on a home exercise device." Bob looks upset as he continues to read, "3. Looks are more important to happiness than brains. 4. If people don't comment on you new hairdo, they hate it." Dogbert says, "It's not healthy to read them all at once, Bob."
Share August 12, 1992's comic on:
Dilbert and a woman sit at a table in a restaurant. The woman says, "I caught the disease puppetitis from somebody I dated." The woman moves her hand like a puppet and says, "Ha ha! That's right! Now her hand is a puppet!" Dilbert thinks, "I hate the nineties." The woman's puppet hand says, "Join us . . . Don't be afraid."