Insult Comic Strips - Page 9

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117 Results for Insult

View 81 - 90 results for insult comic strips. Discover the best "Insult" comics from Dilbert.com.

Needing Vacations

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Needing Vacations - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags vacation, necessity, career, insult

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Man: Do you have any vacations planned? Dilbert: No. I haven't bungled my career so badly that I need to escape from it. Man: I take vacations. Dilbert: I hear you need a lot of them.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags insult, meeting, tardiness, punctual, badmouth, business

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Dilbert: It seems that everyone but Ted made it to this meeting. If we proceed without Ted, our decisions will be underinformed. If we try to reschedule a meeting with all of us, we will miss the critical deadline. Thanks to Ted, we have two ways to lose and no way to win. I say we use this time to say bad things about Ted to make ourselves feel better. I'll start. Ted is a lazy, selfish loser, If I could travel through time, I would prevent Ted's parents from meeting. Don't look at me like I'm the one who came late.

Strategy Document

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Strategy Document - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags strategy, obliviousness, insult

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Dilbert: I saw your email about destroying the company. Boss: Huh? The only email I sent you was my strategy for the coming year. Dilbert: Well, maybe I read it too fast.

Asok Is Offended By Wally

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Asok Is Offended By Wally - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags offense, insult, offensive, fighting, nonviolent resistance

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Asok: I hear you have been comparing yourself to Gandhi, the father of my birth country. That is offensive. It makes me want to punch you. Wally: Have you tried fasting instead? I hear good things about it.

Ambitious Men

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Ambitious Men - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dating, rude, honesty, ambition, insult, relationships

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Woman: I like ambitious men. Are you ambitious? Dilbert: Not especially. For example, I settled for dating you. Woman: That's a terrible thing to say. Dilbert: You're the one who brought it up.

Judging The Robot

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Judging The Robot - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dating, robot, relationships, free will, personality, insult, psychology

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Dilbert: I hear you're dating our office robot. Alice: Stop judging me. Dilbert: I'm not judging you. Alice: Good. Dilbert: I'm judging the robot. Alice: Ouch.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags insult, idiot, obliviousness

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Dilbert: As you know, every project in this company has one idiot on the team. Man: That can't be true. Boss: It is true. I assign one idiot per team to keep them from bunching together. Man: My project team doesn't have any idiots. Dilbert: There's a good explanation for why you think that. Man: I Don't see what that would be. If I had an idiot on my team I would know it. Unless...

Asok Can't Take Immersive Vr Seat

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Asok Can't Take Immersive Vr Seat - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags virtual reality, vr, reality, physical, illusion

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Boss: That seat is taken by Kevin, our new immersive VR employee. Asok: But... I'm a physical person. Boss: Did you just insult Kevin's corporeal identity? Asok: I don't see how that's a problem. Kevin: I can't work in this hostile environment.

Repeating Your Point Too Much

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Repeating Your Point Too Much - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags body cam, camera, survillance, insult, rudeness

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Dilbert: According to my body cam playback, you have repeated your point twelve times. Maybe you could try saying other things for a few minutes. Man: I wasn't expecting you to be so rude. Dilbert: You're not the first to make that mistake.

Winning The Meeting

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Winning The Meeting - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags meetings, game, cruelty, insult, criticism

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Wally: Meetings used to be frustrating and boring until I gamified that situation. Now I try to win meetings by criticizing co-workers offering no ideas of my own, and leaving without any new task. Dilbert: You call that winning? Wally: Compared to my victims, yes.