Martital Status Comic Strips - Page 9

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

86 Results for Martital Status

View 81 - 86 results for martital status comic strips. Discover the best "Martital Status" comics from Dilbert.com.

Dashboard For The Boss

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dashboard For The Boss - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #technology, #ruse, #trick, #deception.

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: It's called a dashboard. It shows the current status of all our projects. With a tool like this, you never need to ask us for status updates. Wally: How'd the fake dashboard gambit work out? Dilbert: Great! He hasn't talked to me in weeks.

Top Dilbert Searches

marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac

Dashboard Never Changes

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dashboard Never Changes - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #deception, #trick, #technology, #status, #ruse

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I noticed that the project dashboard you wrote for me never changes. Dilbert: That's because our projects are always doing great. Boss: It's a static image, isn't it? Dilbert: You're gonna wish you asked that three weeks ago.

Meeting Rooms Are Booked

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Meeting Rooms Are Booked - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meetings, #managers, #scheduling, #conflict

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: My project stalled because all of our meeting rooms have been reserved by managers just in case they need them. My current plan for success is to wait until one of you dies sow e can use your meeting room. Boss: Let's not do project status reports anymore.

Anyone Fired Lately

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Anyone Fired Lately - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #blame, #fired, #scapegoat, #laziness, #excuse

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: Before I give my project status report, has anyone quit or been fired recently? Boss: I fired Ted last week. Now tell me why your project is late. Wally: It was Ted's fault.

Wally Monetizes His Pet Status

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Monetizes His Pet Status - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boss, #criticism, #employees, #managers & supervisors, #money, #office workers, #bribe

View Transcript

Transcript

Carol: I hear you're our boss's new pet employee. Please don't tell him all of the bad things I have said about him behind his back. I'll give you a hundred dollars if you keep quiet. Wally: I knew I could monetize this.

Emergency Project

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Emergency Project - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boring, #boss, #emergency, #excuses, #office workers, #technology, #work

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Do you have any emergencies for me to work on? Boss: I do. Dilbert: Perfect! I needed an excuse to avoid working on the boring parts of my job. Boss: I also need your status report by end of day. Dilbert: I would totally do that if not for this darned emergency.