Professional Liar Comic Strips - Page 9

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

87 Results for Professional Liar

View 81 - 87 results for professional liar comic strips. Discover the best "Professional Liar" comics from Dilbert.com.

Boss Hits Jackpot

Thank you for voting.
 Boss Hits Jackpot - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 13, 2017's comic on:


Tags #gambling, #Win, #loss, #money, #obliviousness, #jackpot

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: My side job as a professional gambler is going great. I won a $5,000 jackpot this weekend. Dilbert: How much did you lose? Boss: About $700,000 and my wife. Wally: Didn't you tell her about the $5,000?

Boss Counts Cards

Thank you for voting.
Boss Counts Cards  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 11, 2017's comic on:


Tags #gambling, #gambler, #card counting, #blackjack, #poker, #cards

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I've decided to become a professional gambler on the side. Dilbert: Sounds risky. Boss: Nah. I'm teaching myself to count cards. 50...51...51...53! Nailed it again!

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 13, 2018's comic on:


Tags #berating, #yelling, #gaslight, #temper, #anger, #frustration

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: What's that gadget? Woman: Are you freakin' serious? Asok: Yes. Woman: Oh... My... God. Do you not remember the long discussion about this thing in the last meeting? Are you trying to gaslight me? I have not patience for trolls! Eat dirt and die! Asok: I joined the project today. This is my first meeting. Woman: Liar! Dilbert: Welcome to the team.

No Policy Against Lying

Thank you for voting.
No Policy Against Lying - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 26, 2018's comic on:


Tags #Catbert, #ted, #evil, #director, #human, #resources, #lying, #policy, #checked

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: Evil director of human resources. Ted: Alice called me a liar. Catbert: What were you doing when that happened? Ted: Lying. Catbert: Maybe we should talk about that. Ted: There's no company policy against lying I checked.

Tweaking Variables

Thank you for voting.
Tweaking Variables - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 31, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #office, #office workers, #strategy, #stupidity

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I can't get my five-year projections to match what you told the board. Boss: Try tweaking the variables until they do. Dilbert: That would make me a liar. Boss: Nah. In five years it will look like ordinary stupidity.

Toxic Employee Covers All Bases

Thank you for voting.
Toxic Employee Covers All Bases - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 01, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #employees, #office workers, #work

View Transcript

Transcript

dibert: hey, aren't you the new toxic employee? toxic employee: i told your boss you think he's a jerk for giving wally an award for work you did. dilbert: i never said that. toxic employee: i covered that base by telling him you're a liar.

Bad Analogy Guy Fits In

Thank you for voting.
Bad Analogy Guy Fits In - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 14, 2019's comic on:


Tags #employees, #insults, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Hi. I'm the bad analogy guy. I can't tell the difference between thinking and simply being reminded of unrelated things. Wally: You'll fit in well here. Man: You dress like a liar.