Read List Comic Strips - Page 9
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View 81 - 90 results for read list comic strips. Discover the best "Read List" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share August 24, 2015's comic on:
Robots Read News. Robot: The Supreme Court ruled that engineers cannot be found guilty of murder. Lawyers argued that any good engineer knows how to get away with murder, so getting caught is proof of innocence. The ruling was unanimous because no one could figure out which side was the liberal one.
Share December 19, 2015's comic on:
Alice: Looks like I'll be adding this guy to my list. Dilbert: List? Alice: I keep a list of who to visit first when society breaks down and there is no rule of law. Dilbert: To build alliances? Alice: That's the sort of optimism that gets you killed in the first hour.
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Share April 13, 2016's comic on:
Man: You didn't answer my email. Dilbert: I don't read long email messages. Long emails are a sign of a disorganized mind. I try to avoid contact with that sort of person. Man: And yet, here I am. Dilbert: I didn't say it works every time.
Share July 25, 2017's comic on:
Wally: Work got a lot easier after I compiled a list of all my best work-avoidance excuses. Man: Wally, can you attend my project meeting? Wally: Well, let me check. Man: I haven't told you when we're meeting. Wally: That matters less than you think it should.
Share October 10, 2018's comic on:
Dogbert the business insultant. Dogbert: Make a journal of everything you do for a week. Then stop doing everything that is on your list because it's making you fat and stupid. The Boss: I have some questions. Dogbert: Add "asks questions" to your list.
Share July 13, 2019's comic on:
Man: I disagree with your email saying the plan won't work. Dilbert: My email said exactly the opposite. I said the plan will definitely work. Man: No, I read it with my own eyes. Dilbert: I'm the one who wrote it!!!
Share September 18, 2019's comic on:
Dilbert: We need to fix our user interface because half of our users can't figure it out. Boss: Tell them to read the manual. Dilbert: That's not how you fix a bad user interface. Boss: Then why do manuals exist? Dilbert: If you need me, I'll be banging my head against a wall.
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Share April 28, 2020's comic on:
boss on cell phone: we need to do spring cleaning. delete any data on our servers that make us look like white-collar criminals or drunken baboons. dilbert: all that leaves is our birthday list. boss through phone line: torch that too.