Reduce Airline Expense Comic Strips - Page 9
116 Results for Reduce Airline Expense
View 81 - 90 results for reduce airline expense comic strips. Discover the best "Reduce Airline Expense" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share August 16, 2008's comic on:
The Boss says, "The company will be using less air conditioning to reduce expenses." The Boss says, "To compensate, we're loosening up on the dress code. Shorts will now be allowed." Wally says, "I'm not going to update my shorts wardrobe until I know this will last."
Share September 17, 2008's comic on:
Tina says, "And then she acted as if I have no right to my opinion!" Dilbert says, "Is the point of this conversation to convey useful information, or just to make yourself feel better at my expense?" Tina says, "Maybe we're bonding." Dilbert says, "Maybe not."
Share February 17, 2009's comic on:
Finance trolls Finance troll says, "Your request for airline travel is denied. We don't have the budget for that." Finance troll says, "Company policy requires you to hitchhike with alleged killers and not offer to pay for gas." Dilbert says, "Well, at least things can't get worse." finance troll says, "Apparently you don't know what 'Alleged' means."
Share March 04, 2009's comic on:
The boss says, "I'll be right back after I inoculate our CEO." The boss says, "If you ever decide to reduce our layers of management, Carl is worthless and he thinks your kids look like the director of sales." The boss thinks, "That should buy me a few months."
Share May 25, 2009's comic on:
Dilbert says, "I'll never be able to finish my project on time." The Boss says, "You need to take ownership." Dilbert says, "Can I hire more programmers?" The Boss says, "No." Dilbert says, "Can I reduce the number of features?" The Boss says, "No." Dilbert says, "So...I'm just taking ownership of the failure?" The Boss says, "Don't be greedy."
Share August 04, 2009's comic on:
The boss says, "Our VP of Sales asks that you answer customer questions through the sales reps, not directly." Dilbert says, "Is the goal to reduce the timeliness of my answers or just to filter out the accuracy?" The boss says, "Why are you like this?" DIlbert says, "Should I tell you or the sales reps?"
Share October 18, 2009's comic on:
the Boss says, "I need you to write a white paper for an industry trade association." Dilbert says, "Fine, but that will leave me with less time to work on my project." The Boss says, "Do the trade association stuff during your unproductive time." Dilbert says, "What exactly is my 'Unproductive time'?" The Boss says ,"It goes by many names, including sleep, leisure and healthy lifestyle." Dilbert says, "If I do less of those things it will reduce the quality of my life below the point at which good hygiene has any utility." The Boss says, "I don't want to make out with your. I just want you to work harder for no extra money." The Boss thinks, "I spend too much time explaining the obvious."
Share January 10, 2010's comic on:
Dilbert thinks, "Groan" Accounting Dilbert says, "I'd like to see someone about my rejected expense report." Creature says, "The problem is that you didn't submit a receipt for your bridge toll." Dilbert says, "Or maybe the problem is that you have a joyless, dead-end job." Dilbert says, "ANd your boss doesn't allow you to use your own judgement because working here is proof that you don't make good decisions." Creature says, "Actually, I was going to approve it." Dilbert says, "You don't have to get an attitude about it."
Share October 31, 2010's comic on:
Dilbert says, "I need this class to update my skills. Will you approve the expense?" The Boss says, "Where's the analysis of alternatives?" Dilbert says, "What?" The Boss says, "When you ask for funding, you need to tell me what my options are." Dilbert says, "Well, okay. That seems logical." Dilbert says, "Option two. Do nothing while I become increasingly unqualified for my job." Dilbert says, "Option three: replace me with someone younger who earns less than I do and already has the skills." Dilbert says, "Oh." Dilbert says, "Options are only good when other people don't have them."
Share January 21, 2007's comic on:
The Boss: From now on, all travel must be booked through the corporate travel web site. Alice: Our travel web site is terrible. It only lets you book the cheapest flight, and that's always on Elbonian Airlines. The Boss: Don't be such a snob. What's wrong with using a discount airline? Alice: Well, they list their destination airports as 'whatever looks soft'. The meals in first class are made of anyone who dies in coach. Their entire security screening process involves shouting at each passenger 'Are you Osama bin Laden?!!!'" "And I once saw a baggage handler wearing my dress. The Boss: Whiner.