Support Group Comic Strips - Page 9

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292 Results for Support Group

View 81 - 90 results for support group comic strips. Discover the best "Support Group" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 31, 2004's comic on:


Tags #tech support, #another company, #determine cause

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"This is Dogbert's tech support. Your problem is caused by another company's product or services." "Shouldnt I tell you my problem before you determine the cause?" "Okay, let's pretend that will change my answer."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 25, 2012's comic on:


Tags #writers, #product descirption, #26 oclock, #fleemsday, #group writing, #real

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Tina: Can we schedule a time to write the product description together? Dilbert: Sure. How about 26 o'clock next Fleemsday? Tina: That's not a real time. Dilbert: It's as real as the productivity of group writing.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 19, 2005's comic on:


Tags #gay boss, #nelson, #male, #no bomus, #train to be boss, #support family, #gay, #dating rugby team

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The Boss: Tina, this is your new supervisor, Nelson. You'll be training him to be your boss. The Boss: There won't be any bonuses this year because i gave it all to nelson. he's a man, sio he needs to support a family. Nelson: Im gay The Boss: Um....civil union and adoption, right? Nelson: Im dating a rugby team.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 19, 2005's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #cable compnay, #new glasses, #couch, #couch tech support

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Dogbert works for the cable company "If your picture is fuzzy then get new glasses." "If my glasses are theproblem, why does the couch look perfectly clear?" "Good question. Please hold while I transfer your to couch tech support."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 07, 2005's comic on:


Tags #tech support, #online customer survey, #how happy

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Dogbert's Tech Support: Please fill out the online customer satisfaction survey." "Um... But you haven't even tried to help me yet." "I like to base my help on how happy you expect to be."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 28, 2005's comic on:


Tags #tech support, #bad computer, #designed to be slower, #unrelaible, #defragment, #disk drive

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"Dogbert's Tech Support " You have a bad case of computer rot." "Your computer is designed to become slower and more unreliable over time so you have to upgrade." "But if you'd like some false hope, I can tell you to defragment your disk drive."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 27, 2005's comic on:


Tags #try rebooting, #tech support, #clone yourself, #adoption, #notice bugs, #slapped 1.0 together, #parents

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Dogbert's Tech Support "Try rebooting yourself." "Clone yourself, put the clone up for adoption, and hope intelligence can be influenced by the environment." "Evidently your parents slapped together Version 1.0 of you and hoped no one would notice the bugs..."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 20, 2006's comic on:


Tags #customer service, #deception, #laziness, #tech support, #trick, #passowrd, #before lunch, #required

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"Hello, I need some tech support." "What's your tech support password?" "I don't have one." "Well, then I can't help you." "Since when do you require a password?" "Usually right before lunch."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 10, 2007's comic on:


Tags #cold learning, #cruelest, #don't wear a coat, #first lesson, #good liar, #sales support engineer, #seeking advice, #how to lie

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Dilbert: I'm a sales support engineer now. Can you teach me to be a good liar? Dogbert: Sure. Meet me on the porch, and don't wear a coat; the cold will help the learning. The first lesson is always the cruelest."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 23, 2008's comic on:


Tags #firing, #humorless stain, #interview boss, #soul of humanity, #support thesis, #worship satan

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Dogbert: The Dogbert gazette is doing a story on your firing of an employee for posting a comic on the wall. I need some quotes that support my thesis of you being a humorless stain on the soul of humanity. Would you say you worship satan, or do you simply respect his nonsense approach to discipline?