Surprised Himself Comic Strips - Page 9
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203 Results for Surprised Himself
View 81 - 90 results for surprised himself comic strips. Discover the best "Surprised Himself" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday January 04,
2000
Tags #dogcart consults, #data minig, #another message, #stealing lunches, #refigerator, #break room, #pudding
Transcript
Dogbert consults: The boss and Dogbert are in a meeting, Dogbert is typing on a laptop. Dogbert says to the boss: "My data-mining software has found another message from God." Dogbert says to the boss: "It says you've been stealing lunches from the refrigerator in the break room." The boss looks surprised and scared. Dogbert says to the boss: "Then it says, "Ha ha, that wasn't pudding!"" The boss covers his mouth with both hands.
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Thursday January 13,
2000
Tags #didn't listen, #good work, #magazine, #more assignments, #new boss, #boss, #secretary
Transcript
Carol hands a sheet of paper to Alice who is at her computer and says: "When you finish this, I have more assignments for you." Alice says to Carol: "Carol, you're the boss's secretary, not my boss. And this is a page from a magazine." Carol says to Alice: "Keep up the good work." Alice answers surprised: "You didn't listen. That can only mean you're the new boss."
Thursday January 27,
2000
Tags #back in 10, #managers, #over communicate, #times of uncertainty, #you're fired, #ted fired
Transcript
The boss says to Ed: "Ed, the experts say managers should over-communicate during times of uncertainty." The boss screams at Ed: "You're fired, you're fired, you're fired, you're fired, you're fired!." Ed looks surprised. The boss says to Ed: "I'll come back in ten minutes to do that again." Ed looks angry.
Friday February 04,
2000
Tags #waiting, #stock isn't vested, #over flow, #limbo, #hell
Transcript
Dilbert thinks to himself in front of his computer terminal: "I can't do anything because I'm always waiting for someone else." Phil, the Ruler of Heck, appears and says to Dilbert: "And you can't quit because your stock isn't vested." Dilbert asks Phil: "Am I in Heck?" The latter replies: "No. I'm just working the overflow from limbo."
Saturday February 05,
2000
Tags #limbo, #a division of heck, #career limbo section, #wait to be seated
Transcript
Dilbert is at the threshold of an entrance bearing the sign: "Limbo, a division of Heck." Phil, the Ruler of Heck, tells Dilbert: "Step inside." Inside, standing by a "Please wait to be seated" sign, Phil informs Dilbert: "You'll be sitting in the Career Limbo section. Goodbye." Arms akimbo, Dilbert thinks to himself: "Jeepers! The service here is terrible!"
Tuesday February 15,
2000
Tags #ceo selling stock, #portfolio, #routine diversification, #sell, #sudden panic, #employees, #boss, #ceo, #business
Transcript
Studying company financial information at his terminal, Dilbert exclaims: "Yikes! Our CEO is selling his stock!" At the Boss's office, the Boss reassures Dilbert: "Don't worry. It's routine diversification of his portfolio." Dilbert says: "Oh...I guess that's okay." Meanwhile the Boss stares at his computer screen and furiously works the keyboard as he thinks to himself: "Sell, sell, sell."
Friday February 18,
2000
Tags #arm hair growth, #on phone, #wait in hall, #hair growing nicely, #wait for boss, #phone call, #asked to wait
Transcript
Outside the Boss's office, Carol, the Boss's secretary, tells Dilbert: "He's on the phone. You'll have to stand here and wait." She continues with her instructions to Dilbert: "Don't leave. Don't make noise. Don't try talking to me." Standing alone and waiting, Dilbert examines his arm and thinks to himself: "Arm hair LX-943 is growing nicely."
Monday February 21,
2000
Tags #paul tergeist, #technology, #new lab partner, #pen hovering
Transcript
A strange-looking man with a tie that sticks-up in the air introduces himself to Dilbert who is sitting facing his computer. The man says: "My name is Paul Tergeist." Dilbert is attentively looking at his computer which displays an error message. Paul Tergeist continues: "I have a way with technology." Dilbert's computer crashes. The Boss appears and asks Dilbert: "Have you met your new lab partner?" Dilbert does not answer him, however, as he is staring with perplexity at his pen, which is suspended in mid-air before his eyes. Dilbert exclaims: "My pen is hovering!"
Monday April 03,
2000
Tags #fake disability claim, #disabled, #hard to believe, #note from doctor, #obvious, #long time
Transcript
Wally says to Dilbert as he pours himself a cup of coffee in the break room, "I'm thinking about going out on a fake disability claim." Wally and Dilbert are walking with a cup of coffee in hand. Wally goes on to say, "Do you think anyone will believe I'm disabled?" Dilbert replies sarcastically to himself without speaking, "It's hard to believe you're not." Wally enters The Boss' office and asks, "Do you need a note from my doctor?" The Boss replies sarcastically unenthused, "No, it's been obvious for a long time."
Wednesday April 05,
2000
Tags #disablity, #jiggle the camera, #test, #walls claim, #sneak, #camera, #caught, #spy, #window, #unsuspecting
Transcript
Asok goes to Dilbert's house to spy on him. While video taping Dilbert's actions, Asok thinks to himself, "Wally's claim of disability will be put to the test." Now from a different view in Dilbert's yard (next to the fence), Asok thinks to himself, "Here we go...oh, yeah...come to Asok...go, baby, go!" Back at the office, Catbert asks Asok "Does he ever move?" Asok replies innocently, "It looks that way when I jiggle the camera."