Tolerate Co Owrkers Comic Strips - Page 9
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285 Results for Tolerate Co Owrkers
View 81 - 90 results for tolerate co owrkers comic strips. Discover the best "Tolerate Co Owrkers" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday September 02,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #floyed remora, #twenty years, #survives, #attaching, #employees
Transcript
The Boss: Dilbert, this is your new co-worker, Floyd Remora. Floyd has worked here for twenty years without developing any skills. He survives by attaching himself to other employees. Dilbert: Go ahead... Ask me how my day went.
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Friday September 27,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #gigabits, #megabits, #laughter, #fun-loving, #outside, #work
Transcript
Dilbert and three co-workers sit at a conference table. A man says, "I think it was fifty gigabits." Another man replies, "I think you mean MEGabits." They all laugh, snort and giggle. Dilbert says, "We're so fun-loving, you'd think ONE of us would have a friend outside of work."
Monday November 04,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #pencil, #electric, #sharpener, #excalibert, #whoever, #remove, #ceo, #co-worker
Transcript
Dilbert says to a man, "Somebody left a pencil in the electric sharpener." The man replies, "That's 'Excalibert.'" The man continues, "Legend has it that whoever can remove Excalibert from the sharpener will become CEO." Dilbert removes the pencil and asks, "Like this?" A beam of light shines down on the pencil.
Monday December 02,
1991
Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #coworker, #the boss, #zimbu, #monkey, #zoo, #keepers, #special, #program, #insult, #intelligence, #workers
Transcript
The Boss points to a monkey and says, "Dilbert, your new co-worker is Zimbu the Monkey." The Boss says, "Zimbu learned English from the zoo keepers in a special program." Dilbert says, "This monkey is an insult to the intelligence of the other workers and I!" Zimbu corrects Dilbert, "Other workers and 'me,' not 'I.'"
Saturday May 16,
1992
Tags #Men, #hair, #head, #combing, #grow, #ear, #clueless, #people, #employee, #meeting
Transcript
A man sits at a conference table with two co-workers. He thinks, "I'm feeling confident today with what appears to be a full head of hair." The man thinks, "Nobody suspects that I'm actually combing the hair that grows in my ears over the top of my otherwise bald head." The man thinks, "It's amazing how clueless these people are."
Wednesday November 11,
1992
Tags #Dilbert, #straw, #loser, #kill, #abusive, #coworker, #floyd, #blue, #short, #murderer, #cheater
Transcript
Ted says to Dilbert and Wally, "Everybody pick a straw. The loser has to kill our abusive co-worker, Floyd." Ted says, "Dilbert loses. He picked the blue straw." Dilbert says, "I thought the SHORT straw loses." Ted replies, "You're already a murderer; don't be a cheater too."
Saturday November 14,
1992
Tags #Dilbert, #floyd, #killed, #Wally, #alice, #first, #aid, #ambulance, #firstaid, #phone, #ted
Transcript
Wally, Ted and Alice confront Dilbert. Alice says, "We heard you killed Floyd, our unbearable co-worker, yesterday." Dilbert replies, "No. I was there, but he choked on his own bile." Alice asks, "What did you do - perform First Aid? Call an ambulance?" Dilbert replies, "I don't know First Aid." Dilbert asks, "Uh . . . Can I use your phone?"
Friday December 11,
1992
Tags #violence, #the boss, #Dilbert, #alice, #ted, #program, #humor, #kick me, #relaxed, #creative, #advantage, #situation
Transcript
The Boss hands a sign to Dilbert, Alice and Ted. The Boss says, "As part of my program to use more humor at work, I'm asking each of you to wear a 'kick me' sign." The Boss tapes a sign to Dilbert's back and says, "I'll check later to see if you're more relaxed and creative." Later, the Boss says to Alice, "You seem to be taking unfair advantage of the situation, Alice." Dilbert and two male co-workers stand covering their groins and looking like they are in pain.
Wednesday March 24,
1993
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #promote, #technical, #primadonna, #disdain, #dummy, #inflatable, #question, #personal, #buddy
Transcript
Dilbert sits in a desk chair and Dogbert stands on the desk. Dogbert says, "Your boss won't promote you to 'Technical Prima Donna' until you learn disdain for others." Dogbert says, "Pretend this inflatable dummy is a co-worker asking a question. See how long you can ignore it. I'll check back later." Dilbert whispers to the dummy, "Psst. Nothing personal, buddy. This is just practice." Dogbert yells, "Hey! Hey!"
Thursday June 17,
1993
Tags #Dogbert, #zombies, #squash, #creativity, #facial, #expression, #comprehension, #marketing, #fear
Transcript
Dogbert stands in front of an audience and says, "The successful zombie knows how to squash the creativity of co-workers." Dogbert points to a picture of a man with bags under his eyes and says, "When you hear a new idea, adopt a facial expression which conveys both fear and an utter lack of comprehension." Dogbert continues, "Those of you who work in marketing only need to add the fear part." Someone asks, "Why is that?"