Too Hot To Work Comic Strips - Page 9
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Dilbert hands the Boss a report and says, "Here's my report. It's some of my best work." The Boss puts the report through a portable shredder that is hanging around his neck. Dilbert says, "I hate that porto-shredder." The Boss asks, "Say, is that a silk necktie?"
Dogbert sits on the hassock watching television. A newscaster says, "At the top of the news: solar flares." The newscaster continues, "CNN correspondent Wolf Blitzer is on the scene." Wolf Blitzer says, "It's another hot day on the sun, Bernie." Dogbert thinks, "Show-offs."
Dilbert, Wally and Ted sit at a conference table. Dilbert says, "Maybe Ted can answer that question . . ." Ted thinks, "Uh-oh." Ted thinks, "They're trying to make me work. I'll have to use body language to discourage them." Ted puts a pencil up his nose and rubs his head. Dilbert says, "Uh . . . Never mind." Ted thinks, "It's working."
Dilbert stands in his house talking on the telephone. His clothes are disheveled. Dilbert says into the phone, "Lucky Airlines? I demand payment for the luggage I lost when we crashed into the mountain." Dilbert says, "No, technically it's not 'lost.' . . . Well, yes, I did eat your complimentary peanuts . . ." Dilbert hands the phone to Dogbert and says, "Help me out here . . . So far, I've agreed to hot-wax their tarmac."
Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I'm going to work like a regular guy even though I just made a fortune in the stock market." Dilbert continues, "That's because I still want to be a useful and contributing member of society." Dilbert continues, "And of course, the workplace is the second most satisfying place to gloat." Dogbert asks, "Are you done here yet?"
Dilbert, Ted and a woman sit at a conference table. Ted says, "Thank you all for coming. There's no specific agenda for this meeting . . ." Ted continues, "As usual, we'll just make unrelated emotional statements about things which bother us. I'll kick it off . . ." Ted throws his head back and yells, "There's never time to get any work done around here!!"
A man shows a photograph to a man behind a desk and says, "His name is Dilbert. He invented something that would make our entire product line obsolete." The man behind the desk asks, "Do you have a plan?" The employee replies, "Uh . . . I could wax your desk with my hair again." The man says, "It's just crazy enough to work."
Dilbert and Wally sit at a table eating lunch. Dilbert says, "Sometimes I worry that I'll never be creative again. Maybe my best ideas are behind me." Wally replies, "Oh, I wouldn't worry. Nothing you've done up to now has been any great shakes either." Dilbert says, "Ooh, so maybe my best work is still ahead of me." Wally replies, "Well, you have to consider the track record here."
Beaver: When you're a lazy beaver, you try to find shortcuts and tricks to get your work done. I got this daytime planner to organize my day efficiently. But all it does is sit there. Dogbert: Looks like you got a bad one.
A man says to Dilbert and Wally, "Hi, guys. I'm Wendell J. Stone the Fourth, recent Stanford MBA and brand new to the workforce." Dilbert and Wally look at each other. Wally says, "Look, 'Wen-dull,' we aren't impressed by your education. At this company it's the quality of your work that counts!" Wendell replies, "I'm your new senior vice president, and I want you to lick the tar off my Porsche now." Wally says, "Okay, but watch the quality of my work!"