How Eich Comic Strips - Page 90

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for How Eich

View 891 - 900 results for how eich comic strips. Discover the best "How Eich" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 10, 2006's comic on:


View Transcript

Transcript

My boss marked me with the plunger of blame. How can I get rid of it? "Eventually your body will absorb the plunger of blame and turn it into the wrinkles of experience." "And then you die." "It's starting to itch!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 18, 2006's comic on:


View Transcript

Transcript

"Wally, how do you cope with the soul-crushing futility of this job?" "One day I realized that sadness is just another word for not enough coffee." "What got into you?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 23, 2006's comic on:


View Transcript

Transcript

"How can I tell if I'm drinking too much coffee?" "What would you do if I told you to quit?" "I'd jab you with a used needle." "In that case, you're fine."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 28, 2006's comic on:


View Transcript

Transcript

"I'm debating on the Internet!" "Ha ha! I'm winning every argument by saying the same thing!" "What's that?" "'How would you like it if Hitler killed you?'" "Hey, I debated you last night!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 05, 2006's comic on:


View Transcript

Transcript

"Today I will teach you how to use your incompetence to achieve your goals." "Step 1: Be incompetent. (Also known as 'the easy part.')" "Step 2: Volunteer for the most difficult and important projects" "Step 3: Convince your boss that an enemy within the company is slowing you down." "Step 4: Insist that competent people be pulled off of other projects to help you." "Step 5: Declare yourself the leader of the competent people" "Step 6: Claim credit for the work of the competent people." "Step 7: After you get promoted, fire the competent people to eliminate witnesses."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 09, 2006's comic on:


View Transcript

Transcript

We've got a dead guy in cubicle D-32. "Uh-oh." "Do you have any idea how much paperwork it causes when someone dies in one of my cubicles?" "Ten more feet to the marketing department."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 12, 2006's comic on:


View Transcript

Transcript

"Before you energize my team with your proposal, let me introduce everyone." "This is Wally. He'll show no reaction because he hopes apathy will kill our idea before it creates work." "This is Alice. She'll leave halfway through your presentation to take a phone call." "This is Asok. He'll be enthusiastic because he doesn't understand how the real world works." "This is Dilbert. He'll tell you why your idea is impossible." "This is Carol. She'll spend the entire meeting wondering if that's your real hair." "And this is Ted. He gave his two-weeks' notice last week." "And I like to keep my eyes closed the entire time because of my allergies. Go."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 08, 2006's comic on:


View Transcript

Transcript

Carl quit. He's the only one who knows how to program the legacy system. "It can't be that hard. Go figure it out." ? "Frack."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 10, 2006's comic on:


View Transcript

Transcript

"This is Dogbert's tech support. How may I abuse you?" "I get an error message every time I open an application." "Try giving me all of your personal information and then checking into rehab." "Then I'll have someone steal your identity and move in with your wife." "There's a good chance that the new guy will know how to fix your computer." "When you get out of rehab, talk your wife into taking you back." "Then never touch your computer again because it hurts the ones you love." "How's work?" "Everyone wants to talk to my supervisor."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 24, 2006's comic on:


View Transcript

Transcript

"I'll be right back after I return these dishes to the cafeteria." "Whoa, whoa!" "Winners don't return dishes to the cafeteria." "Then how do the dishes get back?" "You must use your power of low standards." "Just place the dishes on the floor and wait for a loser with high standards." "Gaaa! Dishes on the floor!" "Once again I have to clean up after slobs!" "It is like a miracle." "Now ask her to bring you back a yogurt."