Women Dont Comic Strips - Page 90
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Share January 04, 2009's comic on:
woman says, "You need to sign the corporate code of conduct." Wally says, "Wow! You're totally hot." woman says, "Um?That's inappropriate, and you need to sign the code of conduct." Wally says, "I don't have a pen, can you take it back to your cubicle and sign it for me?" woman says, "No. And I think you're lying about not having a pen. But maybe we can find one for you." Wally says, "See if Dilbert is in his cubicle, I usually take his stuff and blame the cleaners." woman says, "Just sign the #%!*! code of conduct or I will crush your stupid, bald head!" Wally says, "Do I need to read it?" Woman says, "No. Just say you did."
Share January 03, 2009's comic on:
Topper Asok says, "This recession frightens me." Topper says, "That's nothing!" Topper says, "During the Crimean war, all I had to eat was the cold stench of death!" Asok says, "You don't seem old enough to?" Topper says, "I use moisturizer!"
Share January 02, 2009's comic on:
Asok says, "This is my first recession. How worried should I be?" Wally says, "You'll be fine as long as you don't have any hopes and dreams." Asok says, "But I still have them." Wally says, "It's time to yank off that band-aid."
Share January 01, 2009's comic on:
The Boss says, "You still work here? I thought I downsized you last week." Asok says, "Um?I don't think so." The Boss says, "Check your spam folder after the meeting." Dilbert says, "First recession?"
Share December 31, 2008's comic on:
The Boss says, "Ted, profits are falling. I have to downsize you." Ted says, "You worthless sack of monkey spit! I hope the birds that ate your brain regurgitate pellets down your neck!" Ted says, "I have lots more, but I don't want to burn any bridges."
Share December 27, 2008's comic on:
Wally says, "Where's our pointy haired boss?" Carol says, "He's at an offsite meeting to decide who to lay off." Carol says, "Don't worry. I booked the meeting at the Beelzebub Inn. No one has ever returned from there." The Boss says, "If you don't like the accommodations, next time have your own disgruntled underling book a place."
Share December 22, 2008's comic on:
Dilbert says, "I didn't have time to change out of my work clothes." Dilbert says, "I'm working as a scapegoat for my department. Someday I hope to be a scapegoat for the entire company." Dilbert says, "You told me women like men in uniform." Dogbert says, "I say things."
Share December 11, 2008's comic on:
The boss: We need your new computer for the empty office in the executive suite. We don't want any visitors to see vacant offices. They might think we're having financial troubles. Dilbert: Why don't we put my old computer in the vacant office? My boss: That's crazy talk.
Share December 09, 2008's comic on:
Mordac: You will get a survey asking you how satisfied you were with my service today. If you don't rate my service superior in all categories, I will lose my jobs and my wife will leave me for a more successful man. Dilbert: Is she cute? Mordac: Why do you ask?
Share December 08, 2008's comic on:
Dogbert's tech support Dogbert: May I remotely take over your computer to diagnose the problem? Now hold while I snoop into your personal filed, pilfer your bank accounts and turn your computer into a spam server. Client: THAT'S ILLEGAL! Dogbert: So are 75% of your personal files, but you don't see me getting all huffy.