How Much Slack? Comic Strips - Page 90

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ceiling, #come to attention, #hidden cameras, #mister itchy, #attention

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The boss, asok, Wally and Dilbert sit in a meeting. Dilbert says, "It has come to my attention that some of you belive there are cameras in the ceiling." Asok says, "How did that come to your attention?" The boss says, "Hey, aren't you the one we call "Mister Itchy"?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #all the copies, #bestseller, #house as colleral, #dump, #pay back, #dogbert gets loan

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Caption: "Dogbert gets a loan" Dogbert sits across the desk from a bank executive. Dogbert wags his tail and says, "I plan to buy all the copies of hte book I authored, thus making it a bestseller." Dogbert says, "And I'd like to use your house as collateral. Unless it's a dump." The banker says, "How are you planning to pay us back?" dogbert says, "Do you take books?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #no money down, #plan to conquer, #designed, #sitting, #soft fur

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Dogbert sits in front of the television with the remote. The television says, "'In tape one, I'll teach you how to conquer a small island for no money down.'" Dogbert drops the remote in surprise as the television continues, "First, you must travel to the place you plan to conquer." Dogbert says to Dilbert, "I'm designed for sitting. That's why my butt is covered with soft fur." Dilbert sits beside him on the couch and says, "I think that's happening to me too."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Catbert, #evil director, #shooting credenza, #tina was bad, #card board, #special hat, #suspended, #sentence

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Caption: "Catbert"evil hr Director" Tina sits in catbert's office. Catbert says, "Tina, you are accused of shooting the CIO's credenza five times." Catbert scribbles with a pencil on a piece of paper and says, "I'm writing "Tina was bad" on this cardboard. I order you to attach it to a special hat for two weeks." Tina wears a hat with a stick that hangs over her head. The sign hangs off the stick. Dilbert says, "How did it go?" Tina says, "I got a suspended sentence."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #alice, #assisted suicide, #brochure, #job makes alice sick, #doctor, #doctors office, #medical

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ALice sits in the doctor's office. Alice says, "Are you saying my job makes my sick?" Doctor says, "Don't worry there's a cure." The docotr hands Alice a pamphlet and says, "Here's a brochure on assisted suicide." Alice says, "How do you assists?" The doctor says, "I gave you the brochure."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #hammerhead bob, #lunch, #clean room, #speak louder, #tables

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Caption: "Hammerhead Bob" A man with a hammer for head says, to Alice and Tina , "Are you going to lunch? I'll join you!" Hammerhead Bob, Alice and Tina sit at a table. Alice and Tina are in pain. Boob says, "...And that's why it's called a "clean room." But how clean is it really?" Bob says, "I'll speal louder in case the other table want in on this."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #customer, #appreciation, #celebration, #thanks goodness, #idiots, #joke

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Alice stands behind Asok who work at his computer. Alice says, "Asok, you've been chosen to head our customer appreciation celebration." Alice says, "The theme is "Thank Goodness there are so many idiots." Dilbert, Wally and Alice eat lunch. Dilbert says, "When do you plan to tell him it's a joke?" Alice says, "Let's see how the posters turn out."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #have a meeting, #project, #makes me unhappy, #business

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The boss satnds in Dilbert's cubicle. The boss says, "I'm off to a meeting about your projext. Is there anything I should know?" Dilbert says, "Yes. You should know how dumb it is to have a meeting about my project without inviting me." The boss walks away and thinks, "Every time I learn something it make me unhappy"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #after 5 club, #select group, #employees, #creative ideas, #club for people, #during business hours, #business

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The Boss says to Wally, who is seated at his computer, "Wally, you are invited to my new 'after-5 club.'" The Boss says, "A select group of employees will meet after work to think of creative ideas." Wally turns to The Boss and says, "Is there a club for people who know how to think during business hours?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #reduce budget, #project is vital, #eliminate, #funny part

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The Boss says to Alice, who is seated in her cubicle, "Every department was asked how it could reduce its budget by ten percent." The Boss says, "Your project is vital to the future of the company, so I cleverly offered to eliminate it, knowing they couldn't accept." The Boss says, "Now this is the funny part..."