Good Attitude Award Comic Strips - Page 91

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1000 Results for Good Attitude Award

View 901 - 910 results for good attitude award comic strips. Discover the best "Good Attitude Award" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 01, 2007's comic on:


Tags #busy, #make appointment, #always busy, #in between, #no time, #make no time, #unpredictable, #secretary, #shouts

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Dilbert: "Do you have a minute?" The Boss: "No, I'm busy." Dilbert: "When would be a good time for me to come back?" The Boss: "Come back when I'm not busy." Dilbert: "Aren't you always busy?" The Boss: "Heck, no." "Sometimes I'm in between doing one thing and doing another thing." Dilbert: "When will that happen?" The Boss: "It's unpredictable." "Ask Carol to call you when I'm not busy." Dilbert: "Carol, would you..." Carol: "I'M BUSY!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 08, 2007's comic on:


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"If I invented something that would give me unlimited power..." "...Would you kill me in my sleep so you could steal it?" "Of course not." "Good." "I mean, why would I wait until you were asleep?" "That's just burning daylight." "In fact, I'm thinking of killing you right now just in case you already invented it and you're trying to decide whether you should tell me." "It was a hypothetical question." "Maybe, but it's not a chance I'm willing to take."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 10, 2007's comic on:


Tags #corporate strategy, #plan, #consistent, #leveraging platforms, #rewrite plan, #pretend to follow

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The Boss: "Is your plan consistent with our corporate strategy?" Dilbert: "How would I know?" The Boss: "Don't you know our strategy?" Dilbert: "No. Do you?" The Boss: "Of course I do. It's something about leveraging our platforms." "Does your plan leverage our platforms?" Dilbert: "No, but I can rewrite my plan so it seems as if it does." The Boss: "Good. Go back and do that." "There's no point in having a strategy if you aren't going to pretend to follow it."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 28, 2007's comic on:


Tags #empty brain, #stress, #word knowledge, #past the filters, #mantra, #lindsay lohan, #britney spears, #paris hilton

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Ratbert: My brain is empty. "It feels great!" "Stress is just another word for knowledge." "Wait a minute. How do I know that?" "GAAA!!! Something got past the filters!" "Must...Do...Mantra..." "Lindsay Lohan...Britney Spears...Paris Hilton...Ommmmm." Dogbert: "Are you all good now?" Ratbert: "Have we met?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 02, 2007's comic on:


Tags #coworkers, #cubicles, #question, #busy, #promise of speed, #five seconds, #name calling, #no time, #disrespect, #no help

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Tina; "Do you have a minute?" Dilbert: "No." Tina: "This will just take a second." Dilbert: "No it won't." Tina: "It's real quick." Dilbert: Never is. Tina: "You have my word that it will take no longer than five seconds." Dilbert: "Okay. Go." Tina: "Oh, good. So, I was walking by and I thought maybe I should stop and ask you something because..." Dilbert: "Time's up." Tina: "Jerk" Dilbert: "Liar."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 27, 2007's comic on:


Tags #good will, #purchased, #redesigned headquarters, #horses rump, #executive suite

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Dogbert: "Now that I have purchased your company's goodwill, I plan to make some changes." "I redesigned your headquarters building." CEO: "What's this part that looks like a horse's rump?" Dogbert: "That's the entrance to the executive suite."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 31, 2007's comic on:


Tags #firing, #let go, #no money, #budget, #typo, #request, #planning reward, #hard work

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The Boss: "Ted, I have to let you go, but there's a good reason." "There's no money to pay your salary because I made a typo in my budget request." "Until then, I was totally planning to reward your hard work."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 27, 2007's comic on:


Tags #generic management, #thing, #whats his name, #awrd, #avoiding minutiae

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The Boss: It's time for some generic management. "Did you talk to what's his name about the thing?" Alice: "Um...Yes." The Boss: "There should be some sort of award for avoiding minutiae."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 31, 2007's comic on:


Tags #bitter, #unsuccessful scietists, #lazy journalists, #toddlers thrive, #pollution

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Rent a Weasel. Dogbert: "I need three bitter and unsuccessful scientists and a hundred lazy journalists." weasel: "Very good." Dilbert: "Did you know toddlers thrive on pollution?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 17, 2007's comic on:


Tags #dead horse, #interview, #offcie, #meeting, #chair, #not answering, #few hours, #secretary, #cancel other meetinsg, #take time, #business

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The Boss: "You have good experience as a dead horse, but can you take a beating?" "So, you think you can ignore my questions, do you?" "Cancel all of my meetings, this could take a few more hours."