Want Hardware Comic Strips - Page 92

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

916 Results for Want Hardware

View 911 - 916 results for want hardware comic strips. Discover the best "Want Hardware" comics from Dilbert.com.

Title Promotion

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Title Promotion - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #recognition, #outstanding, #work, #pandemic, #title, #Promotion, #stupid, #raise, #ungrateful, #engineer

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: dilbert, in recognition of your outstanding work during the pandemic, i'm giving you a promotion. dilbert: i don't want a stupid title. i want a raise. what's my new title? boss's voice through phone: "ungrateful engineer."

Wally Works At Home Unsafely

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Works At Home Unsafely - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #warning, #unsafe, #workplace, #work at home, #remote, #live, #judging, #personality, #toxic, #dump, #lazy, #clean, #lucky, #guess, #neighbors, #curtains, #laptop

View Transcript

Transcript

wally on video call with catbert: catbert: i'm issuing you a warning for your unsafe workplace. wally: i work from home. you've never seen where i live. catbert: i'm judging by your personality. you're too lazy to clean anything up, so by now it's a toxic dump. wally: that's a lucky guess. catbert: and you're too lazy to close your curtains, so by now your neighbors want to murder you. wally: that's two lucky guesses.

Chewing A Pen

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Chewing A Pen - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #technology, #business, #video call, #camera, #chewing, #pen, #house, #nose, #address

View Transcript

Transcript

alice on video call. alice: please stop leaning into the camera while chewing the end of your pen. it makes me want to drive to your house and shove that pen up your nose. male office worker: but you won't do that, right? alice: what's your address?

Frequent Victims Club

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Frequent Victims Club - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #join, #frequent, #victim, #club, #beverage, #minute, #dollar, #track, #purchases, #sell, #data, #colleagues, #stores, #customer, #servey

View Transcript

Transcript

man with red apron: would you like to join our frequent victims club? dilbert: no, i just want to buy this beverage. man: you could save a dollar if you join now. it only takes a minute. dilbert: i don't want you tracking my purchases and selling my data. man: i you don't sign up, my colleagues and i will pester you to do it every time you try to buy something. dilbert: i'll take my business elsewhere! man: no. you won't. because other stores are just as bad as we are. dilbert: i am not a victim! man: tell that to the customer survey i'm about to pester you into doing.

Zoom Background Designer

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Zoom Background Designer  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #video conference, #zoom, #video backdrop designer, #accurate, #single, #obvious, #sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

dogbert the video backdrop designer dogbert talking to laptop on table: the background of your video calls says a lot about you. for example, it's obvious you have no women in your life, and your knickknacks suggest you are a latent serial killer. frame switches to wally. wally: spookily accurate. dogbert: exactly. that's what we don't want.

Disagreement Sides

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Disagreement Sides - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #office workers, #disagreement, #Opinion, #facts, #agreement, #sides

View Transcript

Transcript

tina: i'm having a disagreement with alice, and i want you to side with me. dilbert: how about i make up my own mind based on the facts? tina: that's not going to work for me.