Dogbert As Ceo Comic Strips - Page 92
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Share September 10, 2006's comic on:
"How was your conference call?" "Very successful. Bill said he'd find a new supplier for the casing." "Or it might have been Ron, Ted, or Bob. They all sound the same on the phone." "I hope it wasn't Bill. He never follows through." "Ron is too overworked, Ted is a liar and Bob's a moron." "I'd say the call was a waste of time. It might even be a huge step backward." "Success is the happy feeling you get between the time you do something and the time you tell a woman what you did."
Share September 09, 2006's comic on:
What are you going to wear to Ted's wedding? "Whatever comes up in the rotation." "Then she shrieked some nonsense about spending six months shopping for shoes and started to punch me."
Share September 02, 2006's comic on:
Executive Compensation Review Board "How much should we pay our CEO if he just shows up for work?" "FIFTY MILLION DOLLARS!!!" honk honk "The clown makes a good argument." "Aye!"
Share August 24, 2006's comic on:
"Wally has a laziness disability. If you fire him, I will sue you for violating labor laws." "Furthermore, he is part endangered butterfly, on his mother's side." "As we speak, he's looking for a workplace hazard to roll around in."
Share August 07, 2006's comic on:
"Hey, I'm having a Schadenfreude party. Would you like to come?" "Sure! I don't know what Schadenfreude means, but it sounds fun." "Too bad you're not invited, loser." "Ouch." "Best party ever."
Share August 05, 2006's comic on:
"In order to make an informed decision, you would need to know as much as I know." "That's impossible. So instead, by mutual, implied agreement, I will feed you some lies that point you to the right decision." "If we don't upgrade our servers, a herd of trolls will attack headquarters." "No trolls!"
Share August 04, 2006's comic on:
Our CEO only has five minutes. Is that enough time for your PowerPoint presentation? "No. An incomplete explanation of the situation will cause massively harmful strategic choices." "What can we get for four-and-a-half minutes?"
Share July 21, 2006's comic on:
Today I had a choice of doing something important that no one would ever realize... "...Or doing something useless that would look like an accomplishment." "So I attended meetings until I could no longer appreciate the difference." "Keep up the good work."
Share July 15, 2006's comic on:
Dogbert: You're in luck. I've lobbied the governments of several countries to attack your country and liberate you and your oil. Man: We're already a democratic country! You're confusing us with North Elbonia! Dogbert: For a nitpicker, you sure dress poorly.