Look Over Shoulder Comic Strips - Page 92

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"Before I begin my day, I'd like to see which of my thirty projects you still remember assigning to me." "...And thirty: Rename the projects so it's not so easy to spot our over-spending." "None of those ring a bell, but they all seem critical now." "Ouch."

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"I want you to write a business case for lobbying our government to attack Elbonia." "In the risk analysis section, do you want me to assume that hell is real or imaginary?" "Real. But remember to discount the infinite future flows of agony to the present so it doesn't look so bad."

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Today I had a choice of doing something important that no one would ever realize... "...Or doing something useless that would look like an accomplishment." "So I attended meetings until I could no longer appreciate the difference." "Keep up the good work."

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There's a little thing I like to do before any meeting with a marketing guy. BONK! "This way there's more congruence between the things you say and the way you look."

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Did you have a chance to review my PowerPoint presentation? "It's full of technical jargon and it's way too long." "Did you even look at it?" "Why would I look at something like that?"

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"Hi. I'm your new nemesis." "The nemesis function used to be handled informally. Now it's a profession, kind of like project management." "Stand by while I prepare my nemesis face and look for reasons to thwart you." sigh

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I got the latest numbers from Yvonne. "How's Yvonne doing with the sextuplets now that her house burned down and she had shoulder surgery?" "It didn't come up."

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"So, Asok, what have you heard about Ted's project?" "He seems to be in over his head and he's blaming you for cutting the wrong budget." "I hope this doesn't come back to bite me." "Now now, Carol. I'm working my new snitch."

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Did you start the benchmark tests? "I'm all over that like a caterpillar on my Sunday pants." "Does that mean...yes?" "Do birds eat beans to fly faster?"

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"I cannot decide if you are very wise or just a big stupid moron." "Well, I'll tell you, little cowpoke, when the snake falls in love with the spaghetti, it's time to buy a new hat." "You look more flustered than a barefoot squirrel at a tire store." "Gaaa!!! They almost make sense!!"