New Coffee Stirrers Comic Strips - Page 92
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View 911 - 920 results for new coffee stirrers comic strips. Discover the best "New Coffee Stirrers" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share June 02, 2001's comic on:
Dilbert and Alice open a box as Wally stands by, drinking coffee. Alice says, "Dilbert, we should read the set-up instructions." Alice and Dilbert lift the contraption out of the box as Dilbert replies, "Alice, a true engineer never reads the set-up instructions." Wally takes a sip of coffee. Dilbert continues holding the contraption as Alice reads the instruction manual: "It says to keep it away from any slurping sounds." Just then, an arm reaches out and grabs Wally's head.
Share June 04, 2001's comic on:
Dilbert and Wally stand drinking coffee and talking. Wally asks, "What's the ratio of work to gabbing that is still considered 'work'?" Dilbert replies, "I'd have to say one-in-eight, maybe one-in-nine." Wally agrees, "Sounds right." Dilbert pauses and asks, "Does talking about work count as work?" Wally replies, "Well, I'm not enjoying it."
Share June 16, 2001's comic on:
Dilbert stands in front of a complex model. He points on the screen and says, "I designed a product that could fill a gaping hole in the market." Dilbert continues his presentation, pointing to a new slide with two shapes on it, nothing more. He says, "But thanks to the miracle of teamwork it turned into a product with no actual features." The next slide Dilbert points to shows a picture of himself in bed, laughing. He says, "In Phase three I fantasized about my coworkers being eaten by squirrels."
Share July 12, 2001's comic on:
The Boss sits at his desk with a piece of paper in front of him and says, "Frankly, the job is a real no-brainer." A person with a huge hole in their head sits in front of the desk as the Boss continues, "Your resume is a blank piece of paper. I like a man who can be brief." The man with the hole in his head sits between Wally and Dilbert. Wally is eating a donut and coffee. Wally turns to the man and says, "You're ruining my donut experience."
Share July 17, 2001's comic on:
Dilbert and Wally are at the coffee machine. Dilbert says to Wally, "Our lives are pathetic. We do nothing but eat, work, and sleep." Dilbert continues, "Eat, work, sleep...eat, work, sleep...eat, work, sleep." Wally responds, "Great - I just finished lunch and you're making me hungry!"
Share July 26, 2001's comic on:
Dilbert and Dogbert are sitting at the kitchen table, having cereal and coffee. Dilbert is still in his bathrobe. Dogbert says, "By the end of my two-day evolution class I had one surviving student." Dogbert continues as Dilbert raises his coffee cup, "He's probably the cockiest squirrel I've ever seen. Toward the end he weighed three thousand pounds." Dogbert continues as Dilbert takes a sip, "If you asked me who's the unluckiest person in the world, I'd have to say it was the janitor."
Share August 28, 2001's comic on:
Catbert is sitting on The Boss' desk. The Boss says, "First, we'll lower costs by offering a retirement package that induces all the smart employees to leave." The Boss continues, "Then we'll rewrite our mission statement to make it fit better." Dilbert says to Dogbert, "Our new mission statement is, 'If you can read this you should have retired by now." Dogbert replies, "Ouch."
Share September 24, 2001's comic on:
Dilbert is sitting at his computer at home. He says into the telephone, "Look, I have three computers in the house. All three simultaneously lost e-mail but not web function." He continues, shaking his fist in the air, "That means the problem is in your e- mail service. Can you grasp that concept?" Dilbert is laying on the couch with a cup of coffee. He says into the phone, "Okay. I'm re-entering my account information... Hey, guess what? That didn't work either."
Share October 18, 2001's comic on:
Headline: Stock Market Expert. Dogbert is seen through a TV screen. He says, "If your core holding is a falling knife, you can dollar cost average through the dead cat bounce." A man is watching TV on his couch. Dogbert's voice continues, "My secret economic model says you should change your cash allocation from 12.4% to 12.3%." Dogbert and the TV interviewer are seen through a spilt screen on the TV. Dogbert says, "My new book is, 'If you aren't churning, you aren't learning." The interviewer replies, "Don't come back."
Share November 07, 2001's comic on:
Wally and Dilbert are at the coffee machine. Wally says, "I've lost two pounds since I signed up for yoga class." Wally continues, "And I never get sick anymore." Dilbert says, "You haven't had a class yet." Wally responds, "Maybe I'm some sort of yoga prodigy."