Rich People Comic Strips - Page 93
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1000 Results for Rich People
View 921 - 930 results for rich people comic strips. Discover the best "Rich People" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday November 06,
2012
Tags business failures/bankruptcies, honesty, slide toward irrelevance, redesign logo, produce tablet computer, ugly truth, personified
Transcript
Man: There's nothing you can do about your company's long slide toward irrelevance. But if you redesign your logo and produce a tablet computer that no one buys, at least it will look like you're trying. CEO: Who are you? Man: I'm the ugly truth. Most people just ignore me.
Friday November 16,
2012
Tags coffee & tea, exhaustion / tiredness, sploosh
Transcript
Coworker: I'm so tired today. Wally: Sorry. I get excited when people have problems that I know how to solve.
Saturday November 24,
2012
Tags work ethic, projects, meetings, ambiguous golas, no budget, angry team, overworked people
Transcript
Boss: How's your project going? Dilbert: Do you mean the one that has no management support, ambiguous goals, no budget, and an angry team of overworked people who want it to die? Boss: No, the other one. Dilbert: Sometimes there isn't an "other one."
Friday December 07,
2012
Tags jewelry, rich people, expensive watch, entire net worth, ceo, employee
Transcript
Asok: Holy moly! Your watch costs more than my entire net worth. CEO: Thank you. Asok: This isn't a "thank you" situation. CEO: You're welcome?
Saturday December 08,
2012
Tags grass roots politics, taxes, work ethic, initiative, grass roots movement, raise taxes, checkmate, income level
Transcript
Boss: Carol, I can't give you a raise this year because you didn't show enough initiative. Carol: I just formed a grass-roots movement to convince the government to raise taxes on people at your income level. Checkmate. Boss: That can't be legal.
Sunday December 16,
2012
Tags employees, late, chronically late, pre meeting, trick, chronic lateness, power, selfish, bad attitude, business
Transcript
Dilbert: Let's meet before the project meeting to go over a few things. Coworker: Nice try. We chronically late people know when we're being played. Your pre-meeting is a trick to get me to show up on time for the real meeting. But that won't work because poor planning isn't the cause of my chronic lateness. I make people wait for me because I enjoy the power and I don't care about anyone's feelings. Dilbert: Fine. I'll see you at the project meeting at ten. Coworker: Nice try. I know the meeting is at 10:30. Dilbert: How do you keep a job? Coworker: That attitude is exactly why I don't like people.
Thursday December 27,
2012
Tags annoyance, bullying co workers, friendly suggestions, looks like bullying, schedule time, waste time
Transcript
Catbert: I got a report that you've been bullying co-workers. Dilbert: That's dumb. I make friendly suggestions about how people could waste less of my time and it looks like bullying. Catbert: Let's schedule a time to talk more about this. Dilbert: Or-- just a friendly suggestion-- you could not waste my freakin' time.
Thursday January 03,
2013
Tags dress cassually, drive innovation, flex hours, frustration, optimism, start up culture, valued work
Transcript
Boss: We need to foster more of a start-up culture to drive innovation. Dilbert: So we get to dress casually, work flex hours, feel that our work is valued, and get equity in the company. Boss: What would be the name of a culture where people work hard but don't get any of those things you just mentioned.
Friday January 04,
2013
Tags online (web) news, news manufaturer, online media, misleading headlines, snarky bow, news naturally, engineer, news magic, engineering
Transcript
Dogbert: I got a job as a news manufacturer for an online media company. I quote people out of context, add misleading headlines and tie it all up with a snarky bow. Dilbert: I thought the news occurred naturally. Dogbert: "Entineer Thinks News is Magic."
Tuesday February 12,
2013
Tags boss, coffee, good managing, horing, ignorance (knowledge), insulting, managers & supervisors, smart people, confontation, business
Transcript
Boss: Today I learned that the secret of good managing is hiring people who are smarter than I am. Maybe I'll try that next time.


