Agreement With Plan Comic Strips - Page 93

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Agreement With Plan

View 921 - 930 results for agreement with plan comic strips. Discover the best "Agreement With Plan" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #restaurant, #Dilbert, #woman, #waiter, #dating

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and a woman sit at a table in a restaurant. Dilbert says, ". . . So I knew it was either a layer three protocol error or else it was time to recalibrate the scope." Dilbert continues, "Ha ha! I'll avoid the obvious pun about D-channel packet addressing!" The waiter wrestles with the woman for her knife. Dilbert says, "I don't think she's done with her knife." The waiter says, "I know. I lost three engineers this way."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #the boss, #Dogbert, #job, #application, #Promotion

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert stands on a chair across from the Boss's desk and shouts, "I'm a loud dog! Give me a job! You must obey me because I'm loud!" The Boss says, "Okay okay." Dogbert says, "That was too easy. There must be something wrong with the job. It must be an entry level job . . ." Dogbert stands on the desk and kicks something at the Boss. Dogbert shouts, "I want a raise!! Promote me, you imbecile!!" The Boss thinks, "Bad trend."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #executive, #Dogbert, #career

View Transcript

Transcript

The caption says, "Dogbert meets the company president." Dogbert sits across from the president's desk. The president says to Dogbert, "You've made quite a name for yourself in the week you've worked here." Dogbert replies, "It was easy to grab power, once I realized the other executives were just imbeciles with good hair." The president says, "I hope you don't think that of ME." Dogbert replies, "No, that looks like a toupee from here."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business meeting, #Promotion, #Dogbert, #executive man, #management

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert and several executives sit at a conference table. Dogbert says, "Thank you all for coming to this emergency board meeting." Dogbert continues, "As you know, all promotions to senior management are based on hair. I think we all agree this is the best system." Dogbert lifts the president's toupee with a pointer and continues, "But have you noticed that I have a rich lustrous coat, whereas our current president gets a little outside help?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #the boss, #alice, #worklife balance, #productivity

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "Alice, it has come to my attention that you are spending time with your family at night." The Boss continues, "That's time that could be used productively to do work for no extra pay." Alice asks, "Do YOU have a family?" The Boss replies, "Hmm . . . That would explain the people in my house . . ."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #the boss, #alice, #worklife balance, #company

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice stands in front of the Boss's desk and says, "I'm working too many hours . . . I never spend time with my family." The Boss holds up a brochure and replies, "The company cares. That's why we've developed a program to teach you how to cope." Alice reads the pamphlet, "Celibacy and adoption - the choice for the nineties."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #garbageman, #Dilbert, #spelling, #grammar, #writing, #technologists

View Transcript

Transcript

The garbage man looks in Dilbert's trash can and says, "Hoo-boy! I hope you're not going to show this to anybody." The garbage man reads a document and says, "Oh, it's obviously a first draft. By now you've run it though the spelling checker." Dilbert says, "Technologists are concerned with IDEAS, not spelling." The garbage man says, "Well, since you brought it up . . ."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #garbageman, #designs

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to the garbage man, "I wish you'd realize that you're a garbage man, not an engineer. I don't need your suggestions on my designs." Dilbert looks over the garbage man's shoulder and says, "What are you writing? Oh yeah, as if I care." The garbage man hands Dilbert the corrections and says, "If you need help understanding that, the paper boy will be by soon. I've been working with him."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #ratbert, #rat, #punishment, #exercise

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits in his chair reading a magazine. Ratbert stands on the hassock with a leash around his neck and says, "It's time to walk the rat!" Dilbert rolls up the magazine and says, "You're confusing yourself with a dog. The proper way to exercise a rat is to strike it repeatedly with a rolled-up magazine." The caption says, "Should Ratbert be spared? Send your vote by e-mail to: scottadams@aol.com." Dilbert holds the rolled-up magazine over Ratbert's head.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #email, #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #computer, #ratbert, #punishment, #rat, #writers

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert stands on the desk in front of the computer. Dogbert says, "We're being deluged by e-mail!" Dogbert says, "The male writers heavily favor whacking Ratbert with the magazine." Dilbert stands over Ratbert holding a rolled-up magazine. Dogbert continues, "And we have a number of helpful suggestions involving power tools." Dilbert replies, "Boys will be boys."