Let Other People Talk Comic Strips - Page 93

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #the boss, #business meeting, #fitness, #money

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Dogbert stands on a chair across from the Boss's desk. The Boss says, "Congratulations, Mister Dogbert. You submitted the lowest bid for creating our corporate fitness program." The Boss continues, "The other bidders wanted money. You're the only one who offered to do it just for the laughs." The Boss continues, "Although I don't see what's so funny about it." Dogbert replies, "Engineers . . . Aerobics . . . Think about it."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #outdoors, #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #aerobics

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Dilbert, Wally and Alice stand in front of Dogbert wearing shorts and t-shirts. Dogbert says, "Skeptics say that a company fitness program will not succeed. Let's do some aerobics and see who's right!" Dilbert and the other engineers hit and kick each other as they try to do aerobics. The employees lie in a pile on the floor. Dilbert says, "The skeptics are right." Dogbert replies, "We usually are."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #stealing, #Dilbert, #phil, #accounting, #break, #lunch, #office

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Phil the Ruler of Heck leads Dilbert into the elevator by his tie. Dilbert asks, "What's the penalty for stealing a chair??" Phil replies, "You are sentenced to sit in the break room used by the accounting department." Dilbert sits at a table with two men. One man says, "I like to type the number six." The other looks into his paper bag and says, "Cripes! This is my Tuesday lunch bag."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ratbert, #Dogbert, #story, #writing

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Dogbert sits on his pillow. Ratbert says, "I'm writing a short story for people who don't have much patience." Ratbert reads, "Blah, blah, blah. Whatever, blah, blah, etcetera, etcetera." Ratbert says, "If it's a commercial success, the sequel practically writes itself."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bob, #Dogbert, #money, #shopping, #christmas, #man, #wedgie

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Dogbert says to Bob the Dinosaur, "Remember, Bob, it is better to give to Dogbert than to receive . . . Especially at Christmas." Bob replies, "But I don't have any income . . . Except for the coins people drop when I give them wedgies." Bob gives a man a wedgie and money falls out of his pockets. Bob thinks, "It seems like exactly the wrong season to pick up the pace on this sort of thing."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #leaving compnay, #opportunites, #key pharses, #we regret, #years of service, #footnote

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The Boss: "Tim will be leaving the company to pursue other opportunities." "Note the absence of key phrases such as 'we regret' or 'years of dedicated service.' And notice that his new opportunity is not called 'exciting'." Dilbert: "I think you're reading a little too much into that announcement." The Boss: "No, I'm reading the footnote."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #synthesize pheremones, #attraction, #few splashes, #liked it

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dilbert: I synthesized the pheremones that make men and women attracted to each other. A few splashes of this and I'll be irresistible. Dogbert: Do you feel any different? Dilbert: Im starting to really like me.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #potluck lunch, #bring bags, #salt, #ice, #beverage, #mineral water

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Alice: We've reached a new low in the 'potluck lunch' sign-up. Twelve people signed up to bring bags of ice and one person is bringing slat. I need one of you at least bring a beverage. Wally: Put me down for one bag of sparkling mineral water.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #projects floundering, #bold strategy, #reorganize, #department, #last month, #bold

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The Boss: All of our projects are floundering. I decided on a bold new strategy. Dilbert: Let me guess You're going to randomly reorganize the department.... Dilbert: Just like last month. The Boss: you have to admit thats bold.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #new management layer, #middle mangemnet, #new boss, #harfurd, #idiot, #unqualified, #fool

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The Boss: Im creating a new layer of management so I dont have to talk to you anymore. Richard is your new boss. He has an MBA from Harfund University. Dilbert: You mean Harvard don't you? The Boss: Uh oh