Company Phone Comic Strips - Page 94
1000 Results for Company Phone
View 931 - 940 results for company phone comic strips. Discover the best "Company Phone" comics from Dilbert.com.
The Boss says, "I've decided that your tiny company will give us an interest-free loan." The Boss says, "There's no paperwork to sign. We'll just pay your invoices late while snortling." The Boss says, "This is the part where you realize your negotiating leverage is limited." A man, "I demand no snortling!"
A man says, "My tiny company can't survive if you insist on paying our invoices late." The Boss says, "You should have thought of that before you decided to become a tiny company." The Boss says, "Come here for a second." A man says, "Please... not the flyswatter."
The Boss says, "The company will be using less air conditioning to reduce expenses." The Boss says, "To compensate, we're loosening up on the dress code. Shorts will now be allowed." Wally says, "I'm not going to update my shorts wardrobe until I know this will last."
Elbonia An Elbonian says, "Our spies stole this laptop from an employee named Dilbert." The Elbonian says, "Ha ha! We will find his company's secrets and use them!" Another Elbonian says, "heh-heh." Six months later An Elbonian says, "Do you remember mittens? I loved having mittens." The other Elbonian says, "Shut up!!"
An Elbonian says, "A corporate raider has offered to buy our company for nine dollars." Another Elbonian says, "We should ask for more." The first Elbonian says, "He's a tough negotiator." The first Elbonian says, "Now it's only eight dollars?" Dogbert says, "And I want you to do something in your hat."
Alice says, "A corporate raider bought the company and sold off all the assets." Dilbert says, "Well, he can sell our assets but we still have our brains and our spirits!" Dogbert says, "And the brains go to Mutobu the Impaler. Our next auction is for their spirits." BAM
Asok: I have a great idea. Would you like to hear it? The boss: Well, considering your low status in the company and how busy I am I would not enjoy it one bit. Asok: I like speaking truth to power, but I don't like when it speaks back.
We surveyed a thousand people who still have landline phones and no caller I.D. We asked for their opinion on our new technology. 34% said, "Fiddlesticks," and 23% couldn't hear the question. 43% thought we were in the room with them and offered us a hard candy.
Dilbert says, "I didn't have time to change out of my work clothes." Dilbert says, "I'm working as a scapegoat for my department. Someday I hope to be a scapegoat for the entire company." Dilbert says, "You told me women like men in uniform." Dogbert says, "I say things."
Dilbert says, "If we migrate our enterprise applications to the web, and outsource our sales and product development?" Dilbert says, "The entire company can be managed by one monkey." Dilbert says, "Plus a second monkey to look at the powerpoint slides from the first monkey."