Meeting Here Comic Strips - Page 94

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View 931 - 940 results for meeting here comic strips. Discover the best "Meeting Here" comics from Dilbert.com.

Political Talk

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Political Talk - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags brainwashed, business, harmony, messaging, opinions, partisan politics, platforms, political issues, underinformed

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catbert in meeting sitting next to wally and dilbert: catbert: our ceo has banned political talk on all employee messaging platforms. it's just as well because you're all brainwashed and underinformed, so your opinions are not worth the spittle that comes with them. panel shows office building. we hope this change will improve internal harmony.

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Pandemic Sales

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Pandemic Sales - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, sales, high, pandemic, virus, deadly, profit, conscience, feelings

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boss in meeting with dilbert and alice. boss: thanks to the pandemic, our sales are at an all-time high. dilbert: shouldn't we feel guilty for profiting from a deadly virus? boss: i think if we were going to feel that, it would have kicked in by now.

Another Zoom Meeting

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Another Zoom Meeting - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, sarcasm, meetings, zoom, scheduled, emptiness, soul, overeating, Advice

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dilbert on zoom call with boss. boss: we're having another zoom meeting at 4 p.m. dilbert: what's the topic? boss: its about how i fill the deep emptiness of my soul by scheduling zoom meetings. dilbert: have you tried overeating? that seems to work for me.

Tina Is Late For Revenge

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Tina Is Late For Revenge - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, office workers, late, meeting, punctual, three, minutes, plotting, revenge, sarcasm, october

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dilbert: you're late. tina: how do you like it? you were three minutes late that one time last october. dilbert: and you've been plotting your revenge since then? tina: it isn't weird

Loser Detector

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Loser Detector - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, invention, losers, accurate, detection, pings, backwards, sarcasm

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in meeting room. dogbert: i invented a device that can detect losers. boss: how do i know if it's accurate? dogbert: point it at a know loser and see if it pings. boss pointing it at employees: boss: hey! it knows ted is a loser! ha ha ha!!! it says dilbert and alice are losers too! and carol and wally too! ha ha ha!!! this thing is totally accurate! dogbert: you're holding it backward. boss: how exactly does it detect losers? dogbert: they're the ones who hold it backward.

Video Lunch Meeting Rules

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Video Lunch Meeting Rules - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, meeting, zoom lunch meeting, zoom, lunch, beaver, dam, bubblewrap, ugly, eater, video, off, on, sarcasm, microphone

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alice: welcome to our first zoom lunch meeting. if you chew louder than a beaver making a dam out of bubble wrap, please turn off your microphone. and if you are an ugly eater... voice from laptop: we get it. turn the video off.

Tina Misremembers

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Tina Misremembers - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, meeting, cancel, communication, remember, text, message, confirm, trigger, cognitive dissonance, absurd, frogs, hooves, wrong, liar

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Tina: why didn't you tell me you canceled the meeting?!! dilbert: i did. Tina: you absolutely did not. i would certainly remember if you did. dilbert: here are the text messages when i told you i canceled the meeting and you conformed. Alice in a daze. Dilbert: uh-oh. i seemed to have triggered cognitive dissonance. whatever you say next is likely to be an absurdity that allows you to be right when you are wrong. Tina: i told you frogs don't have hooves, but you insisted they did! admit you were wrong! i win you liar! dilbert thinking: this show never gets old.

Racist Scapegoat

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Racist Scapegoat - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, business meeting, hire, racist, racism, woke gang, human, sacrifice, attack, scapegoat, bloodlust

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boss: i hired a racist in case the woke gangs attack us and we need a human sacrifice. coworker: what? boss: when the wokies come for us, we'll throw this guy under the bus to satisfy their bloodlust. coworker yelling: i'm not a racist! boss: they won't know that.

New Loyal Customers

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New Loyal Customers - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, meeting, ceo, woke, advertising, dollars, loss, quarter, offend, straight face, botox, annoying

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ceo: our strategy of being annoyingly woke in our ads caused us to have an eight billion dollar loss this quarter. but it was worth it because sometimes you have to offend some of your customers to make the others loyal. dilbert: how did you say that with a straight face? ceo: no one told you about botox?

Rotting In A Meeting

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Rotting In A Meeting - Dilbert by Scott Adams