Quibbled About Methodology Comic Strips - Page 94

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Quibbled About Methodology

View 931 - 940 results for quibbled about methodology comic strips. Discover the best "Quibbled About Methodology" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 08, 2009's comic on:


Tags #career, #mean, #plans, #murder, #nervous, #misunderstanding, #hatred

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "Carol, I'd like to talk to you about your career goals." Carol says, "My career goal is to take over the department by tricking you into a fatal accident, then telling everyone you're just working from home." The boss says, "That's not right." Carol says, "So you're saying I should set my goals low?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 10, 2009's comic on:


Tags #job, #assignment, #question, #scheme, #excited, #celebrating, #dancing, #lazy, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "Wally, I need you to do an inventory in our warehouses. It should take about a month." Wally says, "Hypothetically, would anyone know the difference if I just made up the numbers?" The Boss says, "Well, no?" Wally says, "Dream job!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 29, 2009's comic on:


Tags #coffee, #stock tip, #ridicule, #criticism, #hair cut, #old fashioned, #doubt, #annoyed

View Transcript

Transcript

Man says, "I have a great stock tip for you, Alice." Alice says, "And I should trust you because you're an expert on all things except your own ridiculous hair?" Man says, "I also know a lot about old cars." Alice says, "Shocker."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 06, 2009's comic on:


Tags #doctor, #medicine, #side effects, #halo, #suggestion, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

Doctor says, "These pills should get rid of the wings that the last pills gave you as a side effect. Doctor says, "It's an off-label use, but I have a good feeling about it." Dilbert says, "What now?" Doctor says, "At this point, sinning is your best bet."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 08, 2009's comic on:


Tags #talking, #telling, #story, #interrupted, #annoyed, #berating, #angry, #hijacked, #criticism, #ridicule, #ignoring

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "And then Ted said he'd?" Man says, "Ho ho! I've seen that a million times!" Man says, "At my old job we used to make cricket noises whenever our manager was approaching." Man says, "But that doesn't mean you should cut corners when it comes to quality." Dilbert says, "You're hijacking our conversation!" Man says, "I'm adding value." Dilbert says, "You don't even know what we were talking about." Wally says, "Apparently you have a social disorder that compes you to insert irrelevant stories and trite observations into other people's conversations." Wally says, "I assume part of the disorder involves not being able to recognize it in yourself." Dilbert says, "I wonder if he can hear us." Man says, "Did I tell you about my camping trip?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 09, 2009's comic on:


Tags #sitting, #complaining, #value, #recession, #ridiculous, #proud, #competing

View Transcript

Transcript

Topper Dilbert says, "The value of my home is down about 40%" Topper says, "That's nothing!" Topper says, "I paid a homeless Elbonian family a million dollars to take my house." Dilbert says, "A recession isn't a competition." Topper says, "Said the loser."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 10, 2009's comic on:


Tags #man, #sitting, #meeting, #contract, #reading, #skipping, #failure, #inefficient, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "My company typically takes about four months to negotiate this type of contract." Dilbert says, "And during that time there's a 100% chance that we'll change our minds or you'll discontinue this product." Dilbert says, "Shall we save some time by declaring failure and blaming each other?" Man says, "I gave up before I even handed you the contract."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 12, 2009's comic on:


Tags #complaining, #pain, #work, #irresponsible, #chugging, #coffee, #suppressing, #lazy

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says, "Gaaa! I feel a sudden pang of caring about the quality of my work!" Glug glug glug glug Dilbert says, "Did you kill it?" Wally says, "I think so, but I'd better roll a donut in front of the cave."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 15, 2009's comic on:


Tags #customer, #hands, #refusal, #ridicule, #criticism, #germs, #angry

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss says, "Dilbert, I'd like you to meet one of our biggest customers. She has some technical questions." Dilbert says, "Whoa! Get that disease-infested paw away from me!" Dilbert says, "Don't you follow the news? Shaking hands is so 2008." Dilbert says, "No offense, but you look more like a virus incubator than a vigorous hand washer." Dilbert says, "So why don't you pull that death stick back up your sleeve and we can pretend this ugly incident never happened." Dilbert says, "And if it's not too much to ask, could you exhale toward things I'm likely not to touch?" Dilbert says, "Okay, now that the pleasantries are out of the way, what can I tell you about our new product line?" Dilbert says, "We lost a customer, but I survived the meeting." The Boss says, "Next time, do it the other way."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 18, 2009's comic on:


Tags #asking, #assignment, #project, #criticism, #annoyed, #ridicule, #stupidity, #unproductive, #inefficient

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "Let's implement cloud computing so I have something to talk about at the executive meeting." Dilbert says, "Tell them we're evaluating it. That way neither of us needs to do any real work." The Boss says, "I like it when you do real work." Dilbert says, "Sorry. I thought you were leading by example."