Time Travel Comic Strips - Page 94
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1000 Results for Time Travel
View 931 - 940 results for time travel comic strips. Discover the best "Time Travel" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday January 01,
2014
Tags television news, act like idiots, mirror, details in mirror
Transcript
Dogbert: In today's news, people all over the world continued to act like idiots. Most of the time it didn't turn out well. For details, look in your mirror.
Top Dilbert Searches
marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Monday January 06,
2014
Tags managers & supervisors, suspicion, startegic engineer group, worst in one group, insightful, business
Transcript
Boss: Ted, I'm moving you to a newly formed strategic engineering group. Ted; Are you putting all of your worst employees in one group so you can later eliminate the function and avoid firing each person individually? Boss: You picked a bad time to to become insightful.
Monday January 13,
2014
Tags employees, mental health, vision not money, mental problems, low self esteem, performance review, business
Transcript
Boss: We need employees that are motivated by our vision, not by money. Catbert: Are we looking for any other mental problems, or just that one? Boss: I"m also a big fan of low self-esteem. It comes in handy at performance review time.
Sunday March 16,
2014
Tags internet & world wide web, movies, clever video, create video, internet, go viral, marketing experts, engineer, more passion, loser attitude, viral video, Entertainment, technology, engineering
Transcript
Boss: I want you to create a clever video about our product for the Internet. But make sure it goes viral or you're a total failure. Dilbert: No one can predict what goes viral. Marketing experts fail at this sort of thing 99% of the time. I'm an engineer with no relevant skills for this assignment. Boss: Maybe you could succeed if you had more passion. Dilbert: Gaaa!!! I need a rational boss, not passion! Boss: That's sort of a loser attitude. Asok: Hey, my video is going viral!
Monday March 24,
2014
Tags conversation, potato, worlds worst conversationalist, russet
Transcript
Coworker: Did I tell you about the time I saw a potato? Asok: We are being assaulted by the world's worst conversationalist. Coworker: It was a russet! Asok: Help! Help! Help!
Tuesday March 25,
2014
Tags boredom, conversation, plantkiller, data, kill plants, office plants
Transcript
Alice: Hey, plantkiller, do you have the ata I asked for? Coworker: Plantkiller? Who calls me that? Alice: Everyone does. Your stories are so boring that you kill all office plants within earshot. Give me a hand signal when you're done. Coworker: This reminds me of the time I took the stairs.
Wednesday March 26,
2014
Tags efficiency experts, stress, consultant, booze muhkidney, business travel, nightmare, business
Transcript
Boss: I hired a consultant from the respected firm Booz Muhkidney. Consultant: My life is a nightmare of business travel, loneliness, and sleep deprivation. I'm only 25 years old! Boss: It's a travel day. He'll calm down after he drinks lunch.
Thursday March 27,
2014
Tags efficiency experts, stress, consultant, booze muhkidney, travel work, unhealthy food, total failure, sleepless nights, power point slides, business
Transcript
Consultant: All I do is travel, work, and eat unhealthy food. I'm a total failure at managing my own life, and yet people hire me for business advice. I haven't slept since October. Dilbert: I was told there would be PowerPoint slides. Consultant from Booze Muhkidney
Tuesday April 08,
2014
Tags injured ceo, rolex watches, steamer trunk, freak accident, helicopter, yacht, company ceo, time flys, having funds, intern, comments, company, employees, office gossip, business
Transcript
Boss: Our CEO was injured when a steamer trunk full of Rolex watches fell out of his luggage helicopter and landed on his yacht. Asok: They say time flies then you're having funds. Alice; Out intern is growing up so fast. Asok: The walk-off is what sells it!
Monday April 21,
2014
Tags big business, money, obliviousness, travel budget, business travel, long term profitability, budget frozen
Transcript
Boss: The travel budget is frozen so we can meet our income estimates for this quarter. Dilbert: Is that because all business travel is a waste of time or because we no longer care about long-term profitability? Take as long as you need. Boss: Um...

