Arms Out Comic Strips - Page 94

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Arms Out

View 931 - 940 results for arms out comic strips. Discover the best "Arms Out" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags lunch, great opportunity, multi level marketing, bible, diet plan

View Transcript

Transcript

"Hey, Dilbert! How would you like to go to lunch?" "Alone." "Alone! Ha ha! but then you'd miss out on this great opportunity!" "It's multi-level marketing plus a diet plan suggested by the bible!" "Shoot me."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags car, late, cold, car wouldn't start, warm out, wind chill factor, no actual car, lied. boss, excuse

View Transcript

Transcript

wally: I'm late because my car wouldn't start in the cold. The boss; Its warm outside. allyL theres a little thing called the wind chill factor. Hello - o - o -o!! Dilbert: that was wrong on many levels. wally: Someday Im gotta get a car.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags evil director, himan resources, cheaper, employee wellness program, sick days, incentives, highly paid workers, more fun

View Transcript

Transcript

"Catbert: Evil director of human resources" "I can't decide what's cheaper..." "...An employee wellness program to reduce sick days or incentivizing the older, highly paid workers to die." "Maybe you could use math to figure it out." "When I said cheaper, I meant more fun."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags work ethic, great managing, engaged, disengaged, praise and recognition, encourage developement, important job, opinions count, prodcutivity, drop dead, learn and grow

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: Here's a list of the twelve elements of great managing. If you do everything on that list, it will make me feel what experts call "engaged." If you fail to do your job properly, I will feel all disengaged and do poor work. This would be a convenient time to give me some praise and recognition. You might also want to encourage my development and tell me my job is important. Remember to care about me as a person and tell me my opinions count. If you do all of that, plus seven more things on the list, you might get some productivity out of me. Boss: Leave my office and drop dead. Wally: Will that help me learn and grow?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags corrective lens, fall in urinal, calls 911, building, happened

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: "To what project would I charge my time in the following situation?" "Let's say that a pair of corrective lenses falls in a urinal, and the owner freaks out and calls 911..." "It hasn't happened yet but I can feel it building up."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags security guard, company owned assets, under clothes, smuggled out, pilferage

View Transcript

Transcript

whoa! whoa! where do you think you're going? you look bloated today as if you have company -owned assets under your clothes. I need to stop relying on my instincts.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags assistant for five years, questions boss, leadership, frustrated, bugging, wax ears

View Transcript

Transcript

Carol: Something's been bugging me. Carol: Ive been an executive assistant for five years. when do I get promoted to executive? Ive got leadership coming out of my ears! The boss: Thats wax.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags drive by management, whats hi sanme, out run, answer no questions, need for clarification, we're dead

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: It's time for some drive-by-management. Don't forget to do the thing for what hs name or else we're dead. must ...outrun cries for.... clarification.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags socially obvious, social defect., change topic

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: welcome to dogcarts school for the socially oblivious. Today I'll pair with someone whose social defect will cancel out your own, woman: GAAA!! I keep trying to tap about my l=kids and you keep changing the topic to your self! Because Im fascinating.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags retail distribution, walgetco, unreasonable, special packageing, foot powder

View Transcript

Transcript

"Meet with our huge retail distributor, Walgetco, and find out what they want now." "Say yes, no matter how unreasonable they are, because we need them more than they need us." ". . .Special packaging, rfid tags, and grind your bones to make store brand foot powder." "Yes!"