Meeting Won't End Comic Strips - Page 94

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Meeting Won't End

View 931 - 940 results for meeting won't end comic strips. Discover the best "Meeting Won't End" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 07, 2013's comic on:


Tags #best policy, #lying, #powerless, #superpower, #truth, #honesty is best policy

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: Honesty is the best policy... whenever you think lying won't work. Otherwise, lying is awesome. It's like a freakin' superpower! Ratbert: Why am I here? Dogbert: I speak truth to the powerless.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 19, 2013's comic on:


Tags #didn't read, #email, #improve communication, #long rambling email, #someone else, #meeting, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Did everyone read about how to improve our communication? Dilbert: Was it a long rambling email that stumbled from one barely coherent point to another? The Boss: That one must have been from someone else. Dilbert: Good because I didn't read it.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 22, 2013's comic on:


Tags #management experts, #fat leaders, #favorably, #athletic ones, #donuts, #forget, #seriously

View Transcript

Transcript

Carol: management experts say fat readers are viewed less favorably than athletic ones, Thats why I didn't order any donuts for your meeting. The Boss: Or did you just forget to do it? Carol: I can't take you seriously looking like that.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 09, 2008's comic on:


Tags #company priorites, #intern, #meeting, #over thinking, #priorities, #projects, #co workers, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: And those are the company priorities for the coming year. Any questions? Asok: Should I be concerned that none of my projects relate to any of those priorities? Wally: You're over thinking again. Asok: Sorry.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 11, 2008's comic on:


Tags #design, #real world, #uninformed criticisms, #meeting, #boss, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: This design will never work in the real world. Dilbert: That design is already widely used in the real world. I can come back later if you need time to concoct additional uninformed criticisms.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 02, 2008's comic on:


Tags #meeting, #boss, #raise, #political capital, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: If I try to give you the raise you deserve, the people above me will just reduce it. Alice: Maybe you could use some of your political capital to argue my case. The Boss: Maybe not.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 21, 2008's comic on:


Tags #explanation for working, #malicious, #prove stupid, #unemployment benefits, #working

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: Wally, I have to fire you for posting a comic comparing managers to drunken lemurs. You won't be eligible for unemployment benefits unless you can prove you were stupid as opposed to malicious. Can you prove you're stupid? Wally: Is thereanother explanation for working here?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 22, 2008's comic on:


Tags #wally fired, #exit interview, #manipulation, #rigged system, #boss, #exploding servers

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I don't hold any grudges about being fired for hanging a comic on the wall. The company will be fine without my secret and exclusive knowledge of the critical systems. If the framistan starts to gabol, just purge the cache within sixty seconds and the servers won't explode.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 10, 2008's comic on:


Tags #breakroom, #coffee into wine, #hay-soos, #jesus, #miracle, #new employee, #special powers, #hair, #bald

View Transcript

Transcript

Pronounced Hay-soos Wally: With a name like Jesus, I can't promise I won't mock you. Foop! Jesus: baldness be gone. Wally: I'm not lazy...and I can see! Jesus: Don't spill your wine."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 11, 2008's comic on:


Tags #jesus, #leader, #team leader, #in need, #12 people, #upgrade systems, #lunch meeting, #bed feelings, #savior, #office

View Transcript

Transcript

It's pronounced Hay-soos. Jesus: My name is Jesus, and I seek twelve people to work on my project. I am the saver of databases. Join me to upgrade our systems. Jesus: First, we're all going to lunch. Asok: I have a bad feeling about this."