Business Ethics Comic Strips - Page 95
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1000 Results for Business Ethics
View 941 - 950 results for business ethics comic strips. Discover the best "Business Ethics" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday December 19,
2012
Tags executives, public opinion, feel engaged, meeting, appearences, business
Transcript
CEO: Before I make my decision, I'd like to ask for your opinions. It's supposed to make you feel "engaged." Dilbert: And you actually plan to listen to us? CEO: I'm hoping it will look that way on the outside.
Top Dilbert Searches
marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Friday December 21,
2012
Tags diseases, employees, frustration, new bad apple, joining project, full disclosure, totally contagious, immune, worms, business, medical
Transcript
Coworker: I'm the new bad apple. I'll be joining your project. In the interest of full disclosure, this is totally contagious. Wally: I'm immune, but not for reasons I'm proud of. Coworker: You must be Wally.
Sunday December 23,
2012
Tags fear, managers & supervisors, snake, cublicle, culture of fear, motivate, short term, first step, urinals, electrified, office plant, pain, tactics, business
Transcript
Dilbert: Gaaa!!! Boss: Did you find the snake in your cubicle? Dilbert: What the...? Boss: I put it there because I'm trying to motivate you with a culture of fear. Dilbert: That only works in the short term! Boss: A leader takes the first step without knowing where the next step will be. So get to work, and by they way, one of the urinals is electrified. It's only set to stun, so don't be a baby about it. Wally: His office plant is clear.
Monday December 24,
2012
Tags business ethics, ad company, deceptive and abusive, mobile app, crying
Transcript
Boss: I hired the Dogbert Ad Company to build some deceptive and abusive ads for our mobile app. Dogbert: I prefer to call our ads "effective." It means the same thing. Our most effective ad looks like a text message from your doctor saying he can't stop crying.
Saturday December 29,
2012
Tags executives, managers & supervisors, reorganizing, overthinking, business
Transcript
CEO: I'm reorganizing the company and giving every manager a new job. Boss: Why? CEO: You're over-thinking it.
Wednesday January 02,
2013
Tags managers & supervisors, obliviousness, good leader, ego, great leaders, awesome, business
Transcript
Catbert: A good leader puts his team ahead of his own ego. Boss: What do great leaders do? I'm thinking it's the opposite, right? Catbert: They don't do what you just did. Boss: They don't be awesome?
Saturday January 05,
2013
Tags frustration, managers & supervisors, meeting, never anticiptae, first draft, business
Transcript
Boss: I need you to help prepare me for my meeting tomorrow. Write up some answers to the questions we could never anticipate. Dilbert: I wouldn't expect much out of my first draft.
Wednesday January 09,
2013
Tags managers & supervisors, obliviousness, actionable anlytics, big data, new jargon, accelrate, business
Transcript
Boss: Do we have any actionable analytics from our big data in the cloud? Dilbert: Yes, the data shows that my productivity plunges whenever you learn new jargon. Boss: Maybe in-memory computing will accelerate your applications. Dilbert: Plunge, plunge, plunge.
Thursday January 10,
2013
Tags best customers, combo pack, creepy bearded guys, potato chips, retail business, tissues
Transcript
Dogbert: Research shows that your best customers are creepy bearded guys. That same group also buys a high volume of potato chips and tissues. Boss: How's that help us? Dogbert: Two words: Combo Pack.
Friday January 11,
2013
Tags cruelty, managers & supervisors, employment studies, good boss, getting riase, less dysfunctional, creepy dude, business
Transcript
Catbert: Studies say employees prefer having a good boss over getting a raise. So instead of giving raises, pretend to be less dysfunctional. It's cheaper. Bwahahahaha!!! Boss: You're a creepy little dude.

