Act As Sales People Comic Strips - Page 95

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Act As Sales People

View 941 - 950 results for act as sales people comic strips. Discover the best "Act As Sales People" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 04, 2006's comic on:


View Transcript

Transcript

The Sales Call "I brought my egghead to talk to your egghead while you and I make out." "Our web services employ XML, Soap and WSDL to achieve interoperable HTTP modules." Mmm mmm mmm "Do you ever think we might be in the wrong jobs?" "I'm not going to kiss you." Mmm mmm

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 06, 2006's comic on:


View Transcript

Transcript

Heh heh! I'll turn my monitor so no passersby can see what I'm doing. "Is he working? Dang! I can't tell." zzzzz "I'm starting to think I can't read people." "Dude. I wasn't kidding. Come back later!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 02, 2006's comic on:


Tags #center of excellence, #presidentail library, #honoring lifes work, #asking questions

View Transcript

Transcript

"I've been asked to design and build our center of excellence." "Which, as I understand it, is like a presidential library honoring my life's work." "In time, people learn to stop asking me questions."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 03, 2006's comic on:


Tags #vp of marketing, #17 years, #lowering margins, #overseeing campaigns

View Transcript

Transcript

Bob will be leaving us after 17 years as vice president of marketing. "Bob's accomplishments include lowering both our margins and our sales while overseeing a series of confusing marketing campaigns." "I hope you'll all join me in wishing for a piano to fall on his head."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 14, 2006's comic on:


Tags #anti depressant, #bad mood, #pepper spray, #gaaa

View Transcript

Transcript

I invented an external anti-depressant. "When I'm in a bad mood I just apply it to other people." Pshht "It used to be called pepper spray." "GAAA!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 30, 2006's comic on:


Tags #best marketing expert, #resume, #nobel prize, #five olympic medals, #marketing biathlon

View Transcript

Transcript

"We need to hire the best marketing expert we can find." "Your resume says you've won the Nobel Prize in marketing, and five Olympic gold medals in the marketing biathlon." "What's a marketing biathlon?" "You ski up to people who won't buy your crap and you shoot them."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 17, 2006's comic on:


Tags #drunken lemur, #written by, #project plan, #other drunken lemurs, #lemur analogies

View Transcript

Transcript

I need your honest opinion about my project plan. Don't hold back. "Your plan looks like it was written by a drunken lemur as a practical joke on other drunken lemurs." "Today I learned that people don't like drunken lemur analogies."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 26, 2006's comic on:


View Transcript

Transcript

"I plan to build my own country on the ocean using barges." "I shall rule with an iron paw, punishing citizens for no reason other than my own entertainment. Buwhaha!!!" "I'm hoping people will put up with it because their homes are near the ocean."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 01, 2006's comic on:


Tags #new vice president, #billon dollars, #garbage barge, #oceanfront realestate, #open business, #barge

View Transcript

Transcript

"I worked all year on a project that got canceled today because we got a new vice president who didn't like it." "I made a billion dollars by convincing suckers that a garbage barge was oceanfront real estate." "Would you lend me some money so I can open my own business." "No, but I know some people on a barge who would."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 26, 2006's comic on:


View Transcript

Transcript

"Alice, our budget is tight so I've been asked to reward you with non-monetary compensation." "Do you know Ken in marketing? You can punch him as hard as you want." "Does Ken know about this?" "People love surprises."