Business Case Apporved Comic Strips - Page 95

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Business Case Apporved

View 941 - 950 results for business case apporved comic strips. Discover the best "Business Case Apporved" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #economy, #money, #demand, #orders, #rejection

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice says, "The company cut my pay so I'm going to date a co-worker to make up the difference." Alice says, "From now on, one of you will be buying all of my meals and gifts." Wally says, "I'm oddly aroused by your offer." Alice says, "In that case it's not you."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #game, #money, #broke, #correcting, #sitting, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "Welcome to another round of 'If we had money.' I'll go first." Dilbert says, "If we had money, we could design and test new products." Asok says, "We could go to training." Dilbert says, "You forgot to say, 'If we had money'!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #employee, #graduate, #new, #avoiding, #useless, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Man says, "I just got my MBA, and I'm here to solve all of your problems." Dilbert says, "Our products are junk and we're completely out of capital." Man says, "Have you tried jargon?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #violence, #punching, #pain, #meeting, #angry, #economy, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice says, "I hear you have an MBA, just like the jerks who ruined the economy." Alice says, "I'm going to punch you so hard that it hurts everyone who has the same degree." Dilbert says, "What as that hideous noise?" Man says, "Ow!!!!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #presentation, #plan, #lying, #marketing, #screaming, #guilt, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss says, "In phase one, we'll tell our customer that the system failure won't happen again." Not us! The boss says, "In phase two, when it happens again, we'll act surprised." The boss says, "Then we'll say a software patch is being installed." Asok the intern says, "Gaaa!!! We're bad people!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #confrontation, #hunchback, #deformed, #boss, #ridiculous, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Ratbert : VP of sales Ratbert says, "Humphrey, you're scaring all of our customers." Ratbert says, "Try to be less pitchforkable." Ratbert says, "Seriously. Can you do that?" Humphrey says, "Who wants a hug?!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #boss, #raising, #hands, #cruel, #threat, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Ratbert: VP of sales Ratbert says, "I'm accompanying Humphrey on this sales call so he can learn from the master." Ratbert says, "I'll begin by giving you something, thus triggering your need to reciprocate." Ratbert says, "Who wants to hit Humphrey with a shovel?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boss, #threat, #violence, #meeting, #sales quota, #deformed, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Ratbert: VP of Sales Ratbert says, "Humphrey, some might say you're below your sales quota because the economy is soft." Ratbert says, "But I say it's because I haven't beaten you enough with this wooden spoon." Ratbert says, "You know what I'm tired of hearing? 'Not my good eye! Not my good eye!'"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #explaining, #angry, #confronting, #annoyed, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss says, "Last week I attended the circle of excellence conference for managers." Alice says, "So, while we were doing actual work, you sat in a circle with a bunch of managers?" The boss says, "It wasn't like that." Alice says, "Oh, I think it was."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #layoffs, #fired, #surprised, #mean, #cruel, #reading

View Transcript

Transcript

the boss says, "Ted, business is slow, and I have to let you go." The boss says, "But I already did your performance review so I thought you might benefit from constructive feedback." Ted says, "'You're like a blister on a skunk's colon.'" The boss says, "A tiny one."