One Week Chart Comic Strips - Page 97

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for One Week Chart

View 961 - 970 results for one week chart comic strips. Discover the best "One Week Chart" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dogberts tech support, #upgrade software, #old software, #back up data, #delete it yourself

View Transcript

Transcript

Caption: "Dogbert's tech support" Dogbert talks on the phone at a computer. Dogbert says, "If you upgrade your software, all of your data will be lost." Dogbert says, "But if you don't upgrade, the old software will corrupt your data one bit at a time." Dogbert says, "And if you try to back up your data, our software will hunt you down and bit-slap you until you delete it yourself."

View more books now

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ceiling, #come to attention, #hidden cameras, #mister itchy, #attention

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss, asok, Wally and Dilbert sit in a meeting. Dilbert says, "It has come to my attention that some of you belive there are cameras in the ceiling." Asok says, "How did that come to your attention?" The boss says, "Hey, aren't you the one we call "Mister Itchy"?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #strategic plan, #everyone supports, #a way to copy, #images, #piece of paper

View Transcript

Transcript

A balding man with extreamly long hair and beard sees Alice in the hall. Bearded man says, "I did it!" Bearded man says, "It's a strategic technology plan that everyone supports." ALice smiles. Bearded man says, "If only there were a way to copy images from one piece of paper to many." Alice frowns.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #buy island nation, #sell a kit, #conquermoppress, #indigent people, #buy rhode island, #evil tyrant

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert and Dilbert sit at a table. Dogbert reads a magazine entiteled "Islands", dilbert drinks coffee. Dogbert wags his tail and says, "did you know you can but your own island nation?" Dogbert says, "They even sell a kit that helps you conquer and oppress the indigent people!" Dogbert wags his tail and says on the phone, "I'd liike to buy Rhode Island... and one "evil tyrant" conquest kit." Person on the phone says, "Would you like a flag with that?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #no money down, #plan to conquer, #designed, #sitting, #soft fur

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits in front of the television with the remote. The television says, "'In tape one, I'll teach you how to conquer a small island for no money down.'" Dogbert drops the remote in surprise as the television continues, "First, you must travel to the place you plan to conquer." Dogbert says to Dilbert, "I'm designed for sitting. That's why my butt is covered with soft fur." Dilbert sits beside him on the couch and says, "I think that's happening to me too."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #gigantic product document, #destroyed, #freak accident, #thomas edison work

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok, Wally and Dilbert stare at a large book. Dilbert says, "One of us will have to read this gigantic product requirements document." Wally says, "Unless it gets destroyed in a freak accident." Wally says, "I have some oily rags in mu cube." Asok thinks, "It's like watching Thomas Edison work."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #freak accident, #ask marketing, #new copy, #queen bee

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally and dilbert stand in front of the boss. Their shirts are torn and dirty, thier faces are burnt and cut. Dilbert says, "The huge product requirements document was destroyed in a freak accident." The boss says, "I'll ask marketing to send you a new copy." As Dilbert and Wally walk away, wally says, "I told you we can't stop them one-bee-at-a-time. We have to go for the queen."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #save money, #cut used papaer, #little squares, #note pads, #less than hour, #print blank pages

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss sits at a conference table with a pad of paper in front of him. The boss says, "We can save money by cutting used paper into little squares to use as note pads." The boss says, "I made these in less than one hour." The boss says, "Not counting the time it took me to print the blank pages."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #everything went wrong, #project wouldn't succeed, #for managers, #reverse amnesia, #project

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert pionts at the overhead. Dilbert says, "Everything went wrong in exactly the way I told you it would." Dilbert says, "In the next phase you will experience something I call "reverse amnesia for managers." The boss says, "Wait a minute; I'm the one who told you that the project wouldn't succeed."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #prospective client, #touring dept, #marketing department, #vacant cubicle, #pretending to work

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss stands in Dilbert's cubicle. The boss says, "A prospective client will be touring our marketing department in an hour." The boss says, "We need you to sit in a vacant cubicle so it looks as if work is done there." Dilbert sits in an empty cubicle pretending to type. a woman points and says, "Hey! that one is only pretending to work!"