Inside Job Comic Strips - Page 97

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981 Results for Inside Job

View 961 - 970 results for inside job comic strips. Discover the best "Inside Job" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 19, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #dog, #pound, #one, #phone, #call, #big, #ball, #demolition, #company

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Dogbert stands in a cage thinking, "No stupid dog pound can hold me for long." Dogbert yells to the dog catcher, "Hey, screw! Don't I get one phone call?!" Dogbert whispers into the telephone, "Hello, is this the Big Ball Demolition Company? . . . Good, I have a rush job for you . . ."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 07, 1990's comic on:


Tags #bob, #dawn, #dogberts, #security, #neutralize, #motives, #accident, #dinosaurs, #cult

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The caption says, "Bob and Dawn join Dogbert's cult." Dogbert says to Bob and Dawn the Dinosaurs, "You two are in charge of security." Dogbert continues, "Your job is to neutralize anybody who questions my motives." Dawn says, "Actually, we have some questions of our own . . ." Dawn asks, "Or should we just neutralize ourselves?" Dogbert replies, "Make it look like an accident."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 02, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #vital, #performance, #stupider, #project, #high visibility, #country, #salute, #janitors' strike

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Dilbert stands in front of the Boss's desk. The Boss says, "Your new project will be VITAL to the performance of this company!" Dilbert thinks, "Uh-oh." Dilbert thinks, "The more he talks it up the stupider the project must be." The Boss says, ". . . High visibility, a chance to excel and be noticed!" The Boss continues, "In fact, I stand to salute you for the job you will be doing! You're what makes this country great!!" Dilbert asks, "Does this have anything to do with the janitors' strike?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 31, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #infiltrated, #buckingham palace, #princess, #frog curse, #disguise, #Charlie, #breath, #smell, #flies, #lady di, #common person

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Dogbert looks at a clock on the wall and thinks, "By now Dilbert should have infiltrated Buckingham Palace." Dogbert thinks, "One kiss from the Princess and his 'frog curse' will be lifted . . . I just hope his disguise works . . ." Inside a tower, Lady Diana asks, "Charlie, why does your breath smell like flies?" Dilbert the Frog answers, "Uh . . . I had lunch with a common person today . . ."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 04, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #michael, #microchip, #Dogbert, #arm chair, #reality, #dreams, #electronics, #consumber

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Michael: ...after you leave you will not remember being inside your computer talking to a microchip. You will purchase worthless computer upgrades and argue that it saves money in the long run. Dilbert: It's a static byte Dwinkelizer... A necessity really.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 03, 1990's comic on:


Tags #computer, #computers, #consumerism, #Dilbert, #Fun, #head, #michael, #microchip, #stuck

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A microchip gives dilbert the tour inside his computer. Michael: ...so you see, it's mostly a trick... We've been sending you subliminal hypnotic suggestions through the video display for years. Dilbert: Like what? Michael: Goofy stuff

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 02, 1990's comic on:


Tags #computer, #computer software, #Dilbert, #display, #internet, #michael, #microchip, #online, #screen, #software

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Michael: Let me show you a round the inside of your computer. Dilbert: Neat! Michael: Here's where we generate the hypnotic signals for your display screen. Dilbert: Why? Michael: To make you think you need more computers. Dilbert: Good lord, you've learned to reproduce!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 23, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #boss, #job, #sez, #raise, #bench, #outside, #project, #stupid

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Dilbert, Dogbert and a man sit on a park bench. The man says, ". . . So then I sez to my boss, 'You can just stuff this stupid project . . .'" The man continues, "Then I sez, 'Let's see YOU do this job.' And I sez, 'I should get a raise.' I gotta go." Dogbert says, "The more they sez 'I sez,' the less likely it is they really said what they sez they said."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 11, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #wage, #benefits, #package, #disloyalty, #verbal, #abuse, #occasional, #legal, #problems, #twenty-four, #hours, #recognition, #positively, #giddy, #toaster

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Dogbert sits at a desk. Dilbert says, "Yes?" Dogbert says, "I'm demanding a new wage and benefits package." Dilbert says, "I already give you everything you want . . ." Dilbert continues, "And in return you give me disloyalty, verbal abuse and occasional legal problems." Dogbert says, "Okay, it's a good job, but I'm putting in twenty-four hours a day!" Dogbert continues, "I think I deserve some sort of special recognition for my good work." An "Employee of the Month" poster with Dogbert's picture hangs on the refrigerator. Dogbert says, "I'm positively giddy." Dilbert says, "You edged out the toaster by two votes."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 27, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #performance, #job, #pencils, #Right, #office

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Dilbert sits across from the Boss's desk. The Boss says, "I decided to recognize you for your job performance." The Boss continues, "So I named one of my pencils after you." Dilbert says, "Gosh. Is that it right there?" The Boss replies, "No. That's my good pencil."