Don't Know Bugs Comic Strips - Page 98

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Don't Know Bugs

View 971 - 980 results for don't know bugs comic strips. Discover the best "Don't Know Bugs" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #programmers, #unix

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at his desk working on the computer. The Boss says, "My boss says we need some eunuch programmers." Dilbert replies, "I think he means Unix not eunuchs. And I already know Unix." The Boss says, "If the company nurse drops by, tell her I said 'never mind.'"

View more books now

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #instructor, #Dilbert, #alice, #ted, #seminar, #managers, #Wally

View Transcript

Transcript

The instructor asks, "Who will be first to brave the hot coals?" Dilbert, Alice and Wally stand together. The man pulls Wally out of the crowd and says, "You will teach the others by example." The instructor says as there is an explosion in the background, "Now, what you learn from Wally's example is: don't use alcohol-based after-shave."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #instructor, #seminar, #managers, #fire

View Transcript

Transcript

The instructor says to Dilbert, "I don't think you're ready." The man continues, "Fire-walking requires complete confidence. Anything less could be dangerous." Dilbert says, "I'm just chilly." Dilbert's pants are rolled up and he has socks on his feet. The instructor says, "Fine . . . Do it with your socks on."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #garbageman, #Dogbert, #morals, #phaser

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert says to the garbage man, "Dilbert won't build a phaser pistol for me. He thinks it's wrong to zap people for fun." The garbage man replies, "Yeah, that would be wrong . . . Unless the people you zap are themselves immoral, in which case you would be on the side of justice." Dogbert says, "I guess it's academic since I don't have a phaser." The garbage man says, "Here, borrow mine."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #the boss, #Dilbert, #mentoring, #matt, #co worker

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Dilbert, "Matt is fresh out of engineering school. You'll be his mentor." The Boss continues, "Whatever you do, don't crush his spirit before Wednesday." Dilbert asks, "Why put it off so long?" The Boss replies, "Because I bet ten bucks we could string him along until Thursday."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #the boss, #business meeting, #fitness, #money

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert stands on a chair across from the Boss's desk. The Boss says, "Congratulations, Mister Dogbert. You submitted the lowest bid for creating our corporate fitness program." The Boss continues, "The other bidders wanted money. You're the only one who offered to do it just for the laughs." The Boss continues, "Although I don't see what's so funny about it." Dogbert replies, "Engineers . . . Aerobics . . . Think about it."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #managers & supervisors, #the boss

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to the Boss, "My chair is broken and the warehouse is out of 'engineer chairs.'" Dilbert continues, "And since I'm . . . You know . . . Empowered, I thought I might order a 'manager chair' for the time being." Dilbert asks, "I've over-stepped my authority, haven't I?" The Boss replies, "Next you'll want a screen door on your cubicle."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ratbert, #Dogbert, #story, #writing

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits on his pillow. Ratbert says, "I'm writing a short story for people who don't have much patience." Ratbert reads, "Blah, blah, blah. Whatever, blah, blah, etcetera, etcetera." Ratbert says, "If it's a commercial success, the sequel practically writes itself."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #stan, #customer, #engineering, #deliver, #salesman, #classes, #night, #karate

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Stan, you promised the customer things that engineering can't possibly deliver do you know what this means?! Stan: It means I'm great salesman and you're a putrid engineer. Maybe you should consider taking classes at night. Dilbert: Karate classes.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bob, #Dogbert, #money, #shopping, #christmas, #man, #wedgie

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert says to Bob the Dinosaur, "Remember, Bob, it is better to give to Dogbert than to receive . . . Especially at Christmas." Bob replies, "But I don't have any income . . . Except for the coins people drop when I give them wedgies." Bob gives a man a wedgie and money falls out of his pockets. Bob thinks, "It seems like exactly the wrong season to pick up the pace on this sort of thing."