One Week Chart Comic Strips - Page 98

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View 971 - 980 results for one week chart comic strips. Discover the best "One Week Chart" comics from Dilbert.com.

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Share November 25, 2005's comic on:


Tags #cubicle cockroach, #working hardly, #kill it, #flame thrower

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"Good morning, Alice!" "Uh-oh, a cubicle cockroach." "Are you working hard or hardly working? Ha ha!" "I must find a way to kill it." "Do you have a flame thrower?" "I can't complain; no one would listen!"

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Share November 23, 2005's comic on:


Tags #ted snadwhich, #left in breakroom, #marked ted, #lost weight, #anger, #red faced

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"I'll be right back. I'm going to grab a Ted sandwich before the meeting." "A what?" "The food people always leave one sandwich in the break room fridge labeled Ted. It tastes like ham." "You're looking good, Ted. Have you lost weight?"

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Share November 22, 2005's comic on:


Tags #seminar, #difficult cowrokers, #groups, #quit job, #syndicated cartoonist

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Welcome to my seminar on dealing with difficult coworkers. "Difficult coworkers generally fall into one of these groups." LAZY MEAN SMART CRAZY "The only way to deal with them is to quit your job and become a syndicated cartoonist." "Thanks for coming."

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Share November 18, 2005's comic on:


Tags #buy advertsising, #gullible world, #2 billion readers, #three readers

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Would you like to buy advertising in my new magazine called 'Gullible World'? "We have between one and two billion readers!" "Wow!" "I figured out how to make three readers sound like a lot."

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Share November 15, 2005's comic on:


Tags #what fresh hell, #eyebrows grow, #comb them, #asleep, #quiet today

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"What fresh hell is this?" "I'm letting my eyebrows grow out." "If I comb them over my eyes, no one can tell that I'm asleep." "You're quiet today."

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Share November 09, 2005's comic on:


Tags #working 80 hours, #per wekk, #ground breaking, #starategies, #my underlings

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I'm working 80 hours per week and you hire someone to do your work??? "Leave him alone so he can think up groundbreaking strategies." "Such as?" "I changed your job title to 'My Underling's Underling.'"

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Share November 06, 2005's comic on:


Tags #quirky co worker, #colossal waste, #invented table, #executive recruiter, #leadership or crazy, #wallet alone

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"GAAA!!! I'm changing!!!" "Suddenly I see you not as a quirky coworker, but as a colossal waste of resources!" "Do you think you matter? No, you do not. I matter." "I invented this table!" "I'd better call someone." "It's an emergency. Send the executive recruiter." "What's your status?!!" "Is it leadership or just regular crazy?" "Too soon to tell." "Hey! Leave my wallet alone!" "He's one of ours."

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Share October 26, 2005's comic on:


Tags #grim reaping, #field, #unpaid overtime cases, #see guys die

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"Someday I hope to get into the grim reaping field." "I don't mind working these unpaid overtime cases, but just once I'd like to see one of you guys die." "Hey, I just realized that my rake is very blunt."

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Share October 16, 2005's comic on:


Tags #take the chair, #don't sell chairs, #sell hope, #hope of chairs, #ship in 2 months, #call and yell, #buy a chair

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SALE "I'll take that chair." "Excellent choice." "Now sit there quietly and try not to ask the one question that will kill this sale." "Is the chair in stock?" "GAAA!!!" "The truth is that we don't sell chairs at all. We sell the hope that a chair will someday be made for you." "How long will that take?" "If I could answer that question, it would be the same as selling you an actual chair." "How about if I tell you it will ship in two months, and you call and yell at me every three months for eternity?" "Did you buy a chair?" "There's no way to know."

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Share October 14, 2005's comic on:


Tags #total sales, #package of software, #engaged in piract, #tiny frisbee, #leap in air, #mouth

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"Our total sales to Elbonia are one package of software." "That can only mean that they're engaged in massive software piracy." "When I toss the tiny Frisbee (TM), you leap in the air and catch it in your mouth." "You first."