Elbonian Man Comic Strips - Page 98

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View 971 - 980 results for elbonian man comic strips. Discover the best "Elbonian Man" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 20, 2005's comic on:


Tags #intermediate species, #hominid, #oyster, #light sensitive blob, #serious pearl

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"Your resume says you're some kind of intermediary species." "That's right." "I'm halfway between hominid and oyster. Someday I hope my light-sensitive blob will become an eye!" "I don't think we can use you." "Oh, man, you're giving me a serious pearl."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 17, 2006's comic on:


Tags #loud guy section, #no loud guy, #date, #man screams, #stories, #noise, #restaurant, #customers, #hostess, #table nearby

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Would you like to be seated in the loud guy section or no loud guy? Menu "They both sound good. We'll try the loud guy section." "I hope he has good stories." "AND THEN!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 25, 2006's comic on:


Tags #outsourcing, #language, #translation, #trade off, #cheap, #money

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My Elbonian factory can manufacture your product for pennies. "Is there any downside?" "Minor translation issues." "They either said 'plastic' or 'the spleen of a pig-footed bandicoot.'" "We don't have any plastic." SPLEENS

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 28, 2006's comic on:


Tags #outsourcing, #language, #time zone, #time, #fatigue, #confusion

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"After seeing the Elbonian mp3 player prototype I scheduled a conference call." "Because of the time difference, the call was at 3 AM. I was groggy and they barely speak any English, but I think we got everything worked out." "He was right. It does look better with the speakers."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 29, 2006's comic on:


Tags #outsourcing, #design, #communication, #miscommunication, #manufacturing, #obliviousness, #marketing, #business

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We ship our new mp3 player in two days. How's the Elbonian factory coming along? "The prototype is the size of a small tractor and it will only play Elbonian polkas." "I'll budget a little extra for marketing." "It's made of asbestos."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 29, 2006's comic on:


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"Dilbert, meet your new coworker, Mister Serdecisions." "Call me Lou." "Can you cover for me tomorrow while I put shelf paper in my kitchen cabinets?" "Tomorrow is our project kickoff meeting." "Good lord, man! I can't put dishes on wood?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 14, 2006's comic on:


Tags #congress, #lobbying, #money, #politicians, #Politics, #voting, #corruption, #enthusiasm

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Dogbert the Lobbyist Dogbert: Congressman, I will give you this bag of money if you vote for tax breaks for my client. Try to be less obvious than the last time. Congressman: Yes! I vote yes! Man: Smooth.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 15, 2006's comic on:


Tags #criticism, #democracy, #government, #lobbying, #Politics, #middle east, #oil

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Dogbert: You're in luck. I've lobbied the governments of several countries to attack your country and liberate you and your oil. Man: We're already a democratic country! You're confusing us with North Elbonia! Dogbert: For a nitpicker, you sure dress poorly.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 30, 2006's comic on:


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"The new employee at work is hot, and she's getting special treatment. How can I get rid of her?" "Water finds its own level. She'll leave within a week." "They say that most people meet their future spouses at work." erk!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 20, 2006's comic on:


Tags #death & dying, #insurance, #luck, #sales, #life insurance

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Bob, the unluckiest insurance agent. Bob: You're making a good decision. Man: Gaaak!