How Much Slack? Comic Strips - Page 98
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1000 Results for How Much Slack?
View 971 - 980 results for how much slack? comic strips. Discover the best "How Much Slack?" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday October 02,
2001
Tags clone of boss, procedure failure, knick knack, small creature, part horse, part human, tiney, antennas
Transcript
A tiny centaur is standing on a table. He says to Dilbert, "I'm a clone of your boss?" Dilbert responds, "The procedure didn't exactly work. So you're not so much a human being as you are a..." Centaur, "God?" Dilbert responds, "Knickknack."
Thursday October 11,
2001
Tags air, company resources, contractor, demands, gravity, hover, using earth, cheap, resources
Transcript
The Boss says to Carl, "Carl, you're only a contractor. You have to stop using company resources." Carl mumbles angrily, "Mmn, Nph, Hbm, Mrm!" The Boss replies, "Yes, I know you bring your own air. But you still use our gravity." Carl is taken aback. He mumbles, "Fbm, Gmp, Rkr!" The Boss responds, "If it's not too much to ask, could you hover?"
Monday October 29,
2001
Tags talking clock, after midnight, talking alarm
Transcript
Dilbert is sitting at his computer. The Boss approaches from behind and says, "My home phone turns into a talking clock after midnight." Dilbert turns slightly. The Boss continues, "Yeah, I didn't believe it either until Wally taught me how to use it." The Boss is at home. A voice from his phone yells, "It's 3:14 in the morning you #%*!* idiot!" The Boss thinks to himself, "Yup."
Wednesday October 31,
2001
Tags evil director, human resources, assistant recovers, cold or flu, should dissolved, winged demon, business
Transcript
The Boss says to Asok, "Asok, I want you to work for the evil director of human resources until his assistant recovers." Asok replies, "From what is he recovering? Is it a cold or perhaps a flu?" The Boss responds, "He saw so much evil that his soul dissolved and he became a winged demon."
Wednesday November 14,
2001
Tags pulls knife, pleasure to meet, psycho hillbilly, crazy old coot, network design engineers
Transcript
The psycho hillbilly raises his knife at Asok and says, "Hi. It's a pleasure to meet you." Asok jumps back and exclaims, "Gaaa!!" Asok says, "You look like a psycho hillbilly" The hillbilly replies, "Thank you very much." The hillbilly continues, "We network design engineers like to dress with a theme." Asok asks, "May I call you crazy old coot?"
Thursday November 29,
2001
Tags congressional hearings, airline, inhumane service, ratbert
Transcript
Headline: Congressional Hearings. A grim panel sits in front of microphones. One man says, "Your airline is accused of providing inhumane service. How do you respond?" Dogbert replies, "Sometimes I wag and sometimes I hold up my paw and say, 'Bah!'" Ratbert adds, "Bah!" Dogbert turns to the rat and says, "You're not allowed to say Bah. Take it back." Ratbert says quietly, "Hab."
Friday November 30,
2001
Tags think aloud, cost, monkeys, swallow tongue, distarctions, stream of consciousness
Transcript
The Boss says to Dilbert, "Okay, let me think aloud for a minute." The Boss continues, "The cost will be $3,000... losing focus... monkeys are funny... my tongue is digesting in my mouth." The Boss concludes, "That didn't help as much as I had hoped."
Monday December 17,
2001
Tags serve food, homeless on christmas, extra hungry, one day, news crews arrive
Transcript
Tina says to Dilbert, "I'm signing up volunteers to serve food to the homeless on Christmas day." Dilbert responds, "How do you know in advance that they'll be extra hungry on that one day?" Tina responds, "Our P.R. firm makes sure they don't get fed for two days before the news crews arrive."
Wednesday January 09,
2002
Tags unemployed, drive electric car, abs, not romantic, turn on, socialize, mingle, party, drinks
Transcript
Dilbert approaches a woman at a party and says, "I'm unemployed and I drive an electric car." Dilbert continues, "These are my abs. I talk too much about myself and I'm not romantic." Dilbert continues, "I realize it's a long shot but does any of that turn you on?"
Friday January 11,
2002
Tags job as waiter, job as engineer, qualified, manager, slapping drunk
Transcript
Dilbert and Dogbert are sitting at the kitchen table drinking coffee. Dilbert says, "Maybe I'll take a job as a waiter until I can get a job as an engineer." Dogbert replies, "You're not qualified to wait on tables." Dilbert responds, "How hard could it be?" A waiter is juggling dishes unsteadily. He says to Dilbert, "The manager is over there slapping a drunk."