Successful Man Comic Strips - Page 98

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Successful Man

View 971 - 980 results for successful man comic strips. Discover the best "Successful Man" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags said same thing, 27 times, using different words, stop talking, rude, repeat yourself

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice says, "Excuse me. By my count, you've said the same thing 27 times, using different words." Alice says, "If I can get sworn statements from everyone here that we understand your point, will you stop talking?" Man says, "That's mighty rude of you." Alice says, "I dont' get your point. Can you repeat it 26 more times?"

Dilbert Characters

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags experinced, industry, technology, youth oriented, culture, modem, hit with modem, new technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Old man: I know what Im talking about. I have thirty years in this industry! Asok: How does that help you understand technology that is six months old in a youth oriented culture? Old man: GRRR... ASOK: Please don't hit me with your modem.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags meeting, sales, annoyance, anger, business

View Transcript

Transcript

man says, "Thanks to a new law, every customer In my sales territory needed to upgrade." man says, "Now I wear a hat made of money. The funny thing is that I'm not even a good salesman." man says, "Next week, the donuts are on me." Alice says, "Die! Die! Die!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags selfishness, rudeness, sales, internet, confusion, sabotage, business, technology

View Transcript

Transcript

The lucky sales guy man says, "My sales quotas were set too low. I plan to buy a yacht with my commissions." man says, "Would you mind programming the navigation system so I can get drunk while my boat takes me places?" Asok says, "Why are you researching where all the pirates attack?" Dilbert says, "It's better if you don't know."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags acting, lesson, occupation

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "We don't have enough money to fund your project, but I don't want to downsize you and shrink my empire." The Boss says, "I hired an acting coach to teach you how to hang around the office pretending to be useful." man says, "Are you dead or just non-expressive?" Dilbert says, "It's called a 'job'"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags acting, lesson, humor

View Transcript

Transcript

Office acting coach man says, "This exercise is called 'the over-worked headcount' man says, "AYOWAAAIEEEOW!" man says, "Can you do that?" Dilbert says, "Are you kidding? I only stop doing it to be polite."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags company, lawyer, stipulations, restrictions, humor, business, legal

View Transcript

Transcript

Company lawyer man says, "The company owns Dilbertfiles.com and all of its I.P. Because you created it at work." man says, "So you'll need to pay us a royalty every time you use the name 'Dilbert'" Dilbert says, "How did you get in my house?" man says, "There's a loophole in your door."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags investing, rudeness, firing, downsizing

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert says, "Your stock fell a penny a share so I bough 51% of the company." Dogbert says, "I'll double my investment just by firing you." Dogbert says, "Thanks for not being totally worthless." Man says, "You're welcome."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags meeting, ridiculous, explanation, business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "Sorry I'm late. My company cut the travel budget so I had to hitch a ride with a serial killer." Dilbert says, "He took me to an abandoned slaughterhouse. I knocked him out with a hambone, stole his truck and drove directly here." Man says, "All I heard was 'Blah, blah, blah, I'm late.'" Dilbert says, "Don't make me get my hambone."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Politics, hearing, argument, economy

View Transcript

Transcript

Bailout hearings Man says, "Mr. Dogbert, did you fly here in a corporate jet?" Dogbert says, "Yes, the same jet that took you on a fact-finding trip to Aruba, you wool-coated glob of fat." Dogbert says, "Bring it on! I can do this all day." Man says, "I yield my time to the hypocrite from another state."