Free Time Comic Strips - Page 99
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View 981 - 990 results for free time comic strips. Discover the best "Free Time" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share May 30, 2009's comic on:
The boss says, "Asok, I want to scrub the CPS database." Asok says, "No one uses that data." Asok the intern says, "But you are incapable of admitting error. So now I must dedicate my time to a thoroughly useless task." The boss thinks, "This job got easier when I stopped listening." Asok says, "It's like death, but without the glamour!"
Share July 18, 2009's comic on:
The boss says, "I need you to do product testing for our new release." Dilbert says, "How could I possible have time for all the work you keep giving me?" The boss says, "Have you tried sacrificing your health?" Dilbert says, "Do I look like I can run marathons?"
Share July 31, 2009's comic on:
Catbert: Evil director of human resources Catbert says, "My old policy was to have security immediately escort out anyone I fired." Sproing! Catbert says, "But that left too much time for weeping."
Share August 10, 2009's comic on:
Wally says, "It takes an average of five people to approve any action in this company, and at any given time, three are on vacation." Wally says, "Should I violate our company culture of consensus building, or just sit around and do nothing for lack of buy-in?" The boss says, "Did you mention flailing around in futility?" Wally says, "I was hoping you forgot that option."
Share August 12, 2009's comic on:
Wally says, "If I don't have enough time to do things right, should I just do nothing?" Wally says, "Or do you prefer that I miss deadlines, or do shoddy work, or pray for divine intervention?" The boss says, "I want everything fast and perfect." Wally says, "Can I buy a prayer rug?"
Share August 14, 2009's comic on:
Man says, "Someone borrowed the unit you asked to see, so I'll show you pictures of models you aren't interested in." Man says, "There's one you don't want?And you sure don't want that one?" Dilbert says, "And how does this help?" Man says, "Would you like a CD of products we no longer carry?"
Share August 27, 2009's comic on:
The Boss says, "And that was the last time I yanked a cable just to find out what would happen." Woman says, "How many inane stories do I have to hear before I can speak to someone who knows something?" The boss says, "She's a story hater."
Share September 12, 2009's comic on:
Dilbert says, "I need more resources on my project." The Boss says, "I'll give you someone from Alice's project." Dilbert says, "Then Alice won't have enough resources." The boss says, "I can only solve one problem at a time." Alice says, "Did he solve your problem?" Dilbert says, "I'm going to say yes."
Share September 16, 2009's comic on:
The Boss says, "Alice, I thought it was time for us to have a little mentoring session." Alice says, "How does this make sense when I'm more capable than you in every imporant way?" The Boss says, "Maybe we can skip the part where I say you need to be more confident and speak out at meetings." Alice says, "Duh,"
Share October 12, 2009's comic on:
The boss says, "Wally, are you done with your project yet?" Wally says, "I'll be done next week." The Boss says ,"You've said, 'Next week' for seven weeks in a row. What makes you think I'm going to believe it this time?" Wally says, "The first six times?"