Hard Time Comic Strips - Page 99

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Hard Time

View 981 - 990 results for hard time comic strips. Discover the best "Hard Time" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #eat, #scare, #Word, #troll, #dress code, #cubicle, #scaring vendors, #word gets around

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I got reassigned to manage our legacy systems. The dress code is "troll." My cubicle is under the walkway. My side job is scaring vendors. Dogbert: Is that hard? Dilbert: Only the first day. After you eat one vendor, work gets around.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #blame, #costume, #date, #lying, #work clothes, #scapegoat, #depatment, #entire comapny, #men in unifrom

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "I didn't have time to change out of my work clothes." Dilbert says, "I'm working as a scapegoat for my department. Someday I hope to be a scapegoat for the entire company." Dilbert says, "You told me women like men in uniform." Dogbert says, "I say things."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #anger, #annoyance, #business trip, #humor, #pleasure, #offsite meeting, #beelzebub inn, #disgruntled underling book

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says, "Where's our pointy haired boss?" Carol says, "He's at an offsite meeting to decide who to lay off." Carol says, "Don't worry. I booked the meeting at the Beelzebub Inn. No one has ever returned from there." The Boss says, "If you don't like the accommodations, next time have your own disgruntled underling book a place."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #customers, #product design, #dumb, #hat, #monkey, #software, #meeting, #computer, #annoyed, #technology, #animals, #business, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "We need to get our customers more involved in the product design cycle." Dilbert says, "We only have customers who are too dumb to check product reviews online." The Boss says, "Do it anyway." Customer says, "Can it wear a hat like a monkey?" Dilbert says, "For the millionth time, software can't wear clothes."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #elbonians, #war, #punching, #pow, #cultural sensitivity

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "Alice, I'm sending you to cultural sensitivity training before we meet with the Elbonians." The Boss says, "Last time you almost started a war." Alice says, "I made one little mistake." FLASHBACK Alice says, "And here's another way the women in my country are different." POW!!!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #coworker, #question, #hold out paper, #technical accuracy, #no, #coffee, #bad attitude, #harsh, #grumpy

View Transcript

Transcript

Coworker says, "Alice, can you check this for technical accuracy?" Alice says, "Nope. Don't have time." Alice says, "And no one else is qualified, so you might as well give up and look for a new job." Coworker says, "That was a bit harsh." Alice says, "You'd be less worthless if you fetched me some coffee."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #servers crash, #verify, #accomplishment, #awesome, #back of head, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says, "Our servers were about to crash, so I wrote a suite of scripts to keep them running." The Boss says, "Your accomplishments are suspiciously hard to verify." Wally says, "So, recapping what we know for sure, you're an inadequate verifier, and you can't rule out the possibility that I'm awesome."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #nose job, #health insurance, #surgery, #dog nose, #veterinarian, #lunch time, #eat, #engineer, #function, #rationalize, #medical, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok says, "I probably shouldn't have gone to a veterinarian for my nose job." Asok says, "But as an engineer, I value function over form, and the airflow is actually quite good." Dilbert says, "You might be rationalizing a little." Asok says, "I pity you with your inefficient nostrils."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #fix control management system, #long time, #meeting, #leadership, #timeline, #failure, #annoyed, #blame others, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "What's taking you so long to fix the control management system?" Dilbert says, "Your leadership has taught me to give you laughably unrealistic timelines, then blame others when I miss deadlines." The Boss says, "You're not even doing that right." Dilbert says, "I guess I need more of your leadership."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #good news, #raise fist, #wireless network, #bad news, #knowledge, #lack of understanding

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss says, "Good news! We won the bid to build a nationwide wireless network!" Dilbert says, "Bad news! We don't know how to build a nationwide wireless network!" Boss says, "It's wireless. How hard could it be to not install wires?"