Think Alike Comic Strips - Page 99
Search Filters
Year
- 2022
- 2021
- 2020
- 2019
- 2018
- 2017
- 2016
- 2015
- 2014
- 2013
- 2012
- 2011
- 2010
- 2009
- 2008
- 2007
- 2006
- 2005
- 2004
- 2003
- 2002
- 2001
- 2000
- 1999
- 1998
- 1997
- 1996
- 1995
- 1994
- 1993
- 1992
- 1991
- 1990
- 1989
Character
1000 Results for Think Alike
View 981 - 990 results for think alike comic strips. Discover the best "Think Alike" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday June 05,
2016
Tags #internet, #viral video, #awkward, #interaction, #insult, #cell phone, #technology
Transcript
Boss: Did you see the viral video of the kitten riding the zebra? Dilbert: I know where this is heading and I don't like it. You're going to spend the next ten minutes looking for that video on your phone while we wait. Boss: It will only take a second. Dilbert: And so it begins. Boss: Here it is. No, wait. Dang. Wrong one. Okay, here it is. Oops, no, wrong one. Narrator: Ten minutes later. Boss: What do you think? Dilbert: I can't see it because you keep moving. Boss: I would let you hold it, but I don't want your germs on my phone. Dilbert: There are a lot of unsatisfying parts to this interaction. Wally: Now my coffee is cold.
Top Dilbert Searches
marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Sunday June 12,
2016
Tags #design, #engineering, #interface, #ui, #obstinacy
Transcript
Dilbert: I simplified the user interface as you suggested. You wanted one button to do eleven different functions. It wasn't easy, but I think you'll be pleased. If you want me to turn up the volume... you hold the button down for exactly five seconds... then double-tap, and double-tap again. Then hold for exactly six seconds. Then press it all the way down, then halfway up, then 27 percent back down. And hold for nine seconds. Or you could admit that you don't know anything about interface design. Boss: Never!
Thursday June 30,
2016
Wally's Email Makes No Sense
Tags #bot, #deception, #laziness, #work ethic, #obliviousness
Transcript
Boss: Wally's emails make no sense. Dilbert: He replaced himself with a chatbot. He designed the chatbot to be useless so you'd think it was him. Boss: And he thought this would fool me? Dilbert: He's been gone for four months.
Saturday July 09,
2016
Ted Has Fly Brain
Tags #greeting card, #sick, #brain damage, #marketing, #advertising, #mindless, #business, #medical
Transcript
Carol: Sign this card for Ted. A fly went up his nose and laid eggs in his brain. Dilbert: Is he coming back to work? Carol: We think he'll live out his days in Marketing.
Monday July 11,
2016
Be Like Entrpreneurs
Tags #motivation, #inspiration, #control, #entrepreneur, #risk
Transcript
Boss: We need to disrupt our entire industry. And we need to move quickly. But check with me before you do anything. I want you to think like entrepreneurs, but not like the brave ones. People: Can do.
Friday July 15,
2016
Just What She Thought
Tags #cell phone, #distraction, #technology, #conversation, #social interaction, #antisocial
Transcript
Woman: I'd better check this. It's just what I thought. Dilbert: What did you think? Woman: I thought I would enjoy my phone more than talking to you.
Sunday August 21,
2016
Tags #financial, #jargon, #money, #accounting, #language
Transcript
Boss: I think it is important for every employee to understand our company's income statement. I don't have time to get into all of the details, so I'll hit the high points. Compared to last year... our ebida have been amortized over an accrued market discount. Meanwhile, our capital account liabilities have a pass-through income that is far larger than our on-time costs. And the mome raths outgrabe. Too far? Dilbert: I wasn't listening.
Saturday September 24,
2016
P Ity The Windowless
Tags #cubicle, #office, #office workers, #location, #window, #ego, #superiority
Transcript
Tina: Do you think you're better than me just because you have a cubicle with a window? Wally: Yes. Continuous exposure to new stimuli makes my brain create useful pathways and connections. Tina: I did not see that coming. Wally: I pity the windowless.
Friday September 30,
2016
Wally Accepts Bribes
Tags #bribe, #bribery, #money, #laziness, #work ethic
Transcript
Wally: I started accepting bribes from co-workers to incent me to do my job. Dilbert: If it didn't work for your employer, why do they think it will work for them? Wally: Something about optimism. Dilbert: They didn't say why? Wally: All I know is that no one paid me to listen to them.
Saturday October 01,
2016
Trust Your First Instinct
Tags #bribe, #bribery, #laziness, #work ethic
Transcript
Boss: People are telling me you are accepting bribes to help co-workers on projects. Wally: You think I'm helping my co-workers? Boss: Good point. That part didn't sound right. Wally: Trust your first instinct.