Drowning In Work Comic Strips - Page 99

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1000 Results for Drowning In Work

View 981 - 990 results for drowning in work comic strips. Discover the best "Drowning In Work" comics from Dilbert.com.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 07, 2005's comic on:

Tags #work, #without supervsion, #teal, #hassle, #show himself out

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The Boss: Can you work well without supervision? Candidate: "No. I need continuous supervision to keep me from stealin' and harassin'." The boss: "I think we're done here." Candidate: "Do you mind if I show myself out?"

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 02, 2005's comic on:

Tags #award, #hard work, #chair, #new chair, #stolen, #happiest moment

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The Boss: This award goes to Asok for his hard work on ... Whatever. Asok: "My dedication has been rewarded! This is the happiest moment of my life!" "Wow! It's lucky that I got a new chair on the same day that mine was stolen."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 23, 2005's comic on:

Tags #change is good, #triple pay, #meeting, #work for free, #change can be bad, #slogans, #logic, #business

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The Boss: "You must learn that change is good." Change is :) "Any questoins?" Wally: "Who wants this one?" Dilbert: "I got it." "Question: Why don't you triple our pay? That would be a change." The Boss: "That would not be in the best interst of shareholders." Dilbert: "Okay, why don't you work for free? That's a change that's good for shareholders." "Or would it be better to admit that change can be very bad?" Wally: "My favorite part was when he yelled, "Stop ruining my slogans with your logic!"" Dilbert: "Snort hee-hee!!!"

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 20, 2005's comic on:

Tags #tina trains, #new boss, #uniformed decions, #sociopathic ego maniac, #like to fidget

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Tina trains her boss Tina: You'll find me in this chair. doing real work. Tina: your job, as I understand it, is to make uninformed decisions and act like a sociopathic egomaniac, Tina: you'll usually stand like this. I also like to fidget and harrumph.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 16, 2005's comic on:

Tags #certified massage therapist, #clicking, #every week, #few minutes, #lengthy questionarie, #one hand, #pen pal, #used pen

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Certified Massage Therapist "Fill out this lengthy medical questionnaire." "That'll save me a few minutes of touching him." "I wonder if he'd know if I only used one hand." "Actually, how would he even know if it's a hand?" "Maybe I have an object here that feels like a hand." "This ballpoint pen will work." "I'm finding some tension here. Okay, it's gone now." "She says I should come back every week until my muscles stop clicking." "Sounds like you found a pen pal."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 03, 2005's comic on:

Tags #new director, #first impressions, #office in lobby, #nearest growler, #directions, #information booth, #directs

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The Boss: Carol, I'm making you our new director of first impressions pro team! Carol: My years of hard work have finally paid off! Im a dierctor! Carol: Why is my office in the lobby? Can you direct me ti the nearest growler?

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 17, 2004's comic on:

Tags #advice for cousin, #carerradvice, #dilmon, #frustrated work environement, #scratch out meager living

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Your cousin Lauren just got her degree in English. Can you give her some career advice? "Would you enjoy scratching out a meager living in a frustrating work environment?" "I've never thought about it." "Obviously."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 12, 2004's comic on:

Tags #cubicle vampire, #happy coowrkers, #in search of, #talk, #work related issues, #life drained, #gut instinct, #you're hire

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Job interview "What's your biggest weakness." "I'm a cubicle vampire." "I wander the cubicles in search of happy coworkers." "Then I pounce!" "Then you suck their blood?" "That was the old way." "I talk about work-related issues until the life is drained from their bodies." "I'm going to trust my gut instinct on this. You're hired." "Have you met the new hire yet?"

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 31, 2004's comic on:

Tags #senior vice president, #impress, #chummy with intern, #slacking slacker, #good motivation

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The Boss: The new senior vice president will be at my meeting, I hope to impress him with my leadership skills. Uh- oh underling alert. I can't be seen getting chummy with an intern, Pleas don't try to make conversation don't don't don't don't Asok: did you do anything fun this weekend? The boss: Here he comes! The boss: get back to work you slacking slacker!!! Good motivating! if he blows ho sons with every necktie. You're my new vice president.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 13, 2004's comic on:

Tags #p/u ratio, #sky rocketing, #productivity, #useful, #mistake, #distarction, #backwards

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"Your P/U ratio is skyrocketing again." "My what?" "Productivity-to-usefulness. It means you produce a lot, but everything you produce is a mistake or a distraction." "I told you last time to do less work!" "Oooh... I did that backwards."