One Over Par Comic Strips - Page 99
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1000 Results for One Over Par
View 981 - 990 results for one over par comic strips. Discover the best "One Over Par" comics from Dilbert.com.
Friday March 31,
2006
Tags marketing guru, tractor sized mp3 players, free ipod, pricing
Transcript
The Marketing Guru "Consumers will buy our tractor-sized mp3 players if we offer something free with each one." "So we'll offer a free iPod with each sale, and free towing to the landfill for our mp3 player." "The rest is just pricing."
Monday March 27,
2006
Tags manager, mp3, obliviousness, outsourcing, product, quality, trade off, elbonian factory, mp3 player
Transcript
"Here's our prototype from the Elbonian factory." "Well, I'm no expert, but this is obviously a good one of these." "It's an mp3 player." "We used to call them plumber's helpers!"
Friday March 24,
2006
Tags art, artist, modern art, expression, obtuse, con, scheme, money, fake
Transcript
My idea is to drape a huge tarp over the hideous sculpture in the courtyard. "My message will be that art is as much about the negative space as the positive." "Plus it's not really art unless someone is winning."
Thursday March 23,
2006
Tags art, modern art, nonsense, taste, culture
Transcript
Famous artist Dogberto will tell us his plans for our lobby. "I plan to buy a drop cloth at Home Depot and drape it over the security desk." "Won't that be hard on the guard?" "Not until I douse it with gas and light it."
Monday March 20,
2006
Tags customer service, deception, laziness, tech support, trick, passowrd, before lunch, required
Transcript
"Hello, I need some tech support." "What's your tech support password?" "I don't have one." "Well, then I can't help you." "Since when do you require a password?" "Usually right before lunch."
Sunday March 19,
2006
Tags 360 degree reviews, peer input, negative review, peer review, next raise, annoymous, realization
Transcript
"It's almost time for our 360 degree reviews." "That means your compensation is partly dependent on the input of your peers." "I'd hate to see something bad happen to you, like, I don't know...maybe a negative review." "I've taken the liberty of calculating the value of a good peer review in terms of your next raise." "Pay me half of that amount, and I'll guarantee a positive outcome." "How would I know you gave me a good one? Peer reviews are anonymous." "What is it about me that makes people so distrusting?"
Monday March 13,
2006
Tags expressing opnion, thousand expressions, the wood chipper
Transcript
"Erk! That look says you want to kill me for expressing my opinion!" "No, no." "Women have a thousand expressions that say they want you to die. That one says she wants you to die of natural causes, preferably soon." Budda budda budda "She calls this one 'The Wood Chipper.'"
Thursday March 09,
2006
Tags written in stone, actual stone, stone tablet
Transcript
We're supposed to have our budget approved by Tuesday but that's not written in stone. "Yes it is. I have it right here." "It was kind of lucky because this is the only one I brought to the meeting."
Wednesday March 01,
2006
Tags ethics course, on line course, perfect scores, taking for boss
Transcript
What?! You only got a 'B' taking the online ethics course for me? "No one will believe you're me unless you get all perfect scores." "I...was...tired." "Why? You only did 300 push-ups for my online gym class!!!"