Clone Of Boss Comic Strips - Page 99
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1000 Results for Clone Of Boss
View 981 - 990 results for clone of boss comic strips. Discover the best "Clone Of Boss" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday March 29,
1994
Tags #commercially viable, #hard drive, #installed software, #tail, #zimbu, #monkey, #animals
Transcript
The Boss: Well, well, It looks like Zumbu has designed another commercially viable product using only his tail. Dilbert: I could have done that....If I hadn't erased my hard drive when I installed my security software. I don't produce much, but its very secure. Monkey: Heres another one.
Wednesday March 30,
1994
Tags #use tail, #operate mouse, #engineers, #no tail, #rocky, #new programmer
Transcript
Dilbert: Zimbu, you're not supposed to use your tail to operate the mouse. If tails were a natural advantage for engineers then evolution would provide usual with tails! The Boss: Dilbert, I don't believe you've met Rocky, out new C programmer.
Tuesday April 05,
1994
Tags #corporate politics, #waste basket, #teach everything, #promoted level
Transcript
Dilbert: I want you to teach me everything you know about corporate politics so I can get promoted to your level. The Boss: To truly understand office politics you must wear a waste basket on your head for one full day. LATER Dilbert: Does this really work? The Boss: It works for me.
Thursday April 14,
1994
Tags #project dew drop, #test report, #explodes, #beta trial, #friendly customers, #killed, #friendly ones, #project ducky
Transcript
The Boss: I agreed to ship Project 'Dewdrop' to some customers for beta testing. Dilbert: Didn't you read my test report? Dewdrop explodes when you plug it in. The Boss: we'll limit the beta trial to friendly customers. Dilbert: we killed all the friendly ones with project ducky.
Tuesday April 26,
1994
Tags #no raises, #appliances, #television, #fridge, #lava lamp, #jar of mayonnaise, #dog, #boss, #dilberet, #animals, #Entertainment
Transcript
"This year, instead of raises we're giving appliances." "What?!" "High performers could get a color television or a new 'fridge." "He called it a 'lava lamp'." "I call it a jar of old mayonnaise."
Thursday April 28,
1994
Tags #top priority, #last month, #dated
Transcript
The Boss: Take care of this immediately. It's your top priority. Dilbert: Top Priority?? This is dated last month, Its been on your desk for weeks and now its your top priority?? The Boss: I said its your top priority. I still don't care about it, Dilbert: well...okay the,
Saturday May 07,
1994
Tags #boss made pass, #cat ate ring, #family in coma, #irs audit, #seek relief, #woes, #anti woe cologne
Transcript
Alice: I'm going to seek relief from my many woes by sharing them with you. My entire family is in a coma....The cat ate my wedding ring,,,,The IRS is auditing us....my boss made a pass at me. It isn't working, you aren't absorbing my woes. Dilbert: Im wearing into woe cologne.
Saturday May 14,
1994
Tags #huge time saver, #final consulting, #company, #deadweight, #employees.fired, #company directory, #business
Transcript
Ratbert: Here's my final consulting report on your company. Ive listed all the deadweight employees who should be fired. The Boss: This is the company directory. Ratbert: Finding that was a huge time saver.
Friday May 20,
1994
Tags #good inertia, #marketing department, #project, #under funded, #uniformed decision, #take blame
Transcript
The Boss: How's your project coming along? Dilbert: Its under-funded and doomed. But Ive got some goof inertia going and Im setting the marketing department up to take the blame. The Boss: I feel like I should be doing something here. Dilbert: Ive got you planned to make an uniformed decision next week.
Saturday May 21,
1994
Tags #change project, #actual knowledge, #changes, #voicemail
Transcript
The Boss: "We just had a meeting and decided to change your project substantially." "We didn't invite you to the meeting because things go smoother when nobody has any actual knowledge." Dilbert: "So, what are the changes?" The Boss: "If I remember, I'll leave you a voice mail."