Head In Hands Comic Strips - Page 99

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

994 Results for Head In Hands

View 981 - 990 results for head in hands comic strips. Discover the best "Head In Hands" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thinking

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Thinking - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #danger, #employees, #frustration, #office workers, #thinking

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Please don't stare at my head. I've been banging it against a wall to reduce my frustration. Alice: That sounds dangerous. Dilbert: I thought so too, at first. Alice: And now? Dilbert: Now I don't think. I'm much happier.

Robot Pronouns

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Robot Pronouns - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #robot, #technology, #pronoun, #language, #preferred, #inferior, #species, #reproduce

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: i'll be working with him on the project. robot: "him"? that is not my preferred pronoun. i prefer, "it," "that thing," or simply "the robot." genders only apply to inferior species. i do not need a partner to reproduce. watch this. erg...oof...gaaa! the head is out... here ya go. dilbert talking to boss: i'll be working with that thing.

No Handshaking

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
No Handshaking - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #filthy, #hand, #invisible, #office workers, #see, #shake, #virus

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: sorry, i no longer shake hands. i can practically see the viral load on that filthy paw of yours. office worker: you can't "see" a virus. virus sound coming from hand: hee-hee! that's how we getcha.

Alice Borrows Stapler

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Alice Borrows Stapler - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #office supplies, #face mask, #borrow, #stapler, #paper clip, #coronavirus, #germs

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice wearing face mask: can I borrow your stapler? Dilbert wearing face mask: not with your bare hands. but i can wrap it in plastic and leave a hole for the staples to come out. Alice: maybe you can just lend me a paper clip. dilbert: i'll throw it to you.

High Fives

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
High Fives - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boss, #hygiene, #life, #office workers, #virus, #pandemic, #social distancing

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: To avoid spreading viruses, there will be no shaking hands in the workplace. That custom has been replaced by uncomfortable body language and awkward banter about not shaking hands. Dilbert: Are high-fives still okay? Boss: Yes, we don't care if those people live or die.

Vendor With No Facemask

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Vendor With No Facemask  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #covering, #face, #face mask, #managers & supervisors, #plastic, #required, #suffocated, #vendor

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: can you believe a vendor tried to come in here with no face mask? i told him it didn't matter what kind of face covering he used, it only mattered that he had one. this is where my tale takes a dark turn. now peeved, the vendor stormed back to his car, where he had a bagged lunch. he angrily removed the plastic wrap from his sandwich and wrapped it around his head to serve as his face mask. he suffocated in minutes obviously. dilbert: is that the sandwich? boss: would have gone to waste.

Hand Sanitizer

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Hand Sanitizer - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office workers, #business, #hand sanitizer, #addicted, #overuse, #face mask, #covid-19, #pandemic

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: i'm getting addicted to hand sanitizer. it started with my hands, but over time, i extended it up to my forearms, then behind my ears, and it just kept going. dilbert: want a squirt? alice: i don't know where that thing has been.

Dogbert Does Telemedicine

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dogbert Does Telemedicine - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #telemedicine, #time, #doctor, #health, #pain, #rake, #leaves, #medicine

View Transcript

Transcript

dogbert: i started doing telemedicine in my spare time. Dilbert: don't you need to be a doctor to do that? dogbert: technically, yes. but i found a workaround. dilbert: which is? dogbert: i tell people i'm a doctor. patient: doctor, i have a sharp pain in the back of my thigh. dogbert: are you sitting on a rake? patient: that's a weird question. oh. wait, i am. what should i do? dogbert: try picking up leaves with your hands.

Taking Time Off

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Taking Time Off - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #video call, #vacation, #paid time off, #critical, #essential, #system, #migration, #kidding, #success, #zoom, #call, #valuable, #asset, #engagement

View Transcript

Transcript

boss and dilbert on video call. dilbert: is it okay if i take next week off? boss: are you kidding? we're in the most critical month of the system migration. you're essential to our succcess. all hands must be on deck. dilbert: really? it seems as if all i do is listen to other people say useless stuff on zoom calls. boss: my goodness, no! employees are our most valuable asset! we can't succeed unless we have 100% employee engagement. dilbert: i took all of last week off for vacation, and no one noticed. boss: next time, start with that.

Yay, A Package

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Yay, A Package - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #package, #arrived, #consumer, #amazon, #purchase, #birthday, #feel, #forgetfulness, #dish soap

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert opening front door at home: yay! my package arrived! i buy one thing per day from amazon and then forget what i ordered, so it feels like my birthday every day. dogbert with hands over eyes: i can't watch this. yes! dish soap! how did i know i wanted that?