Project Review Meeting Comic Strips - Page 99

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Project Review Meeting

View 981 - 990 results for project review meeting comic strips. Discover the best "Project Review Meeting" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #statue, #front entrance, #unlucky guy, #karl, #feed birds, #serving example

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss addresses a meeting, "Our facilities management says the new statue by the front entrance isn't a statue." The Boss continues, "It's an unlucky guy named Karl who had been warned many times not to feed the birds." The Boss continues, "Then it talks about statistical clustering.. blah, blah, blah.. and serving an example."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #scheduled, #secretary, #moron, #doesn't respect, #stuck in traffic, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss approaches Carol and asks, "Carol, where's my ten o'clock?" Carol responds, "He said he'd be late because you're a moron and he doesn't respect you." The Boss' appointment comes in and asks Carol, "Did you tell him I was stuck in traffic?" Carol responds, "It's not always about you."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #greek, #greek word, #parthenon, #word for sports event, #zeus, #new product

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss addresses a meeting, "Wally has been researching Greek words to name our new product." Wally says, "All I have is Zeus. And Parthenon. And the word 'Greek' itself." Wally continues, "I understand they have a word for sports even too. I'm trying to track that down."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #just in time, #inventory, #strategy, #deepest sympathy, #sharp stabbing pain, #promises

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert is meeting with a client. The client says, "My company is moving to a 'Just in Time' inventory strategy. You'll deliver when we need it." Dilbert responds, "So.. your success depends on my company doing what it promises? You have my deepest sympathy." The client points to his own chest and says, "I feel a sharp, stabbing pain in my chest." Dilbert replies, "And so it begins."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #user requirements, #build system, #some actual work, #crazy talk

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert is meeting with a client. Dilbert says, "I'll design the system as soon as you give me the user requirements." The client responds, "Better yet, you could build the system, then I'll tell your boss that it doesn't meet my needs." Dilbert says, "I don't mean to frighten you, but you'll have to do some actual work." The client responds, "That's crazy talk."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #work, #requirements, #cleverly hide comptenece, #workflow

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to The Boss, "I can't start the project because the user won't give me his requirements." The Boss replies, "Start making something anyway. Otherwise we'll look unhelpful." Dilbert says, "So, our plan is to cleverly hide our competence." The Boss responds, "You think too much."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #critical, #engineer, #handshake, #head with lies, #new team player, #parinoid, #soft and clammy hand, #undead, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss introduces a woman to Dilbert, "Dilbert, meet your new team member, Peri Noid." Peri Noid extends her hand and asks, "Why haven't you invited me to a meeting? Who's filling your head with lies?" Peri Noid continues, "Your hand is soft and clammy! Are you the undead?!!" Dilbert replies, "Engineer."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #head hunter, #ceo section, #resume, #re word, #less criminal sounding, #more honest, #plundered

View Transcript

Transcript

Headline: Dogbert the Headhunter. Dogbert is meeting with a client. He says, "We'll need to reword the CEO section of your resume." Dogbert continues, "For example, there's never a right time to use the word 'plundered.'" Dogbert continues, "And instead of 'suckers ignored our P/E ratio,' say you 'enhanced stockholder value.'" The client replies, "Wow. You're good."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #orchestra od data, #ironic spelling, #geneous mistro

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert, Wally, and a coworker are meeting. The coworker holds up a sign and says, "We named the product 'Geneousmistro' because it conducts an orchestra of data." The coworker continues, "Can you believe the domain name 'Geneousmistro' wasn't already taken?" Dilbert asks, "Is the spelling meant to be ironic?" The coworker replies, "Why do you ask?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #leave work early, #don't walk past, #office of boss, #just from roof, #land in dumpster, #leadership, #cut throat

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss addresses a meeting, "Our VP is mad because people are leaving work too early." The Boss turns to Alice and says, "If you need to leave early, don't walk past his office. Go to the roof and leap into the 'dumpster' in the alley." The VP sits smugly in his office and thinks, "Leadership triumphs again." Alice can be seen through the window behind him jumping off the roof into the dumpster.