Tina and Dogbert are sitting in a meeting. Tina is looking at a sheet of paper and she says to Dogbert: "Wow! The Dogbert investment fund has higher fees that any other!" Dogbert answers: "It's true!" Dogbert says to Tina: "That's how you can tell it's the best fund." Tina says: "I'm in." Tina is signing a check and asks: "Are you diversified?" Dogbert answers: "Yes, I have suckers of all types."
Dogbert the financial planner
Dogbert: With advances in health care, you could live to be 200.
If you have a good financial plan, only the last 120 years will be spent in squalor. I recommend a diversified portfolio. And bacon."