Form Opinions Comic Strips
164 Results for Form Opinions
View 1 - 10 results for form opinions comic strips. Discover the best "Form Opinions" comics from Dilbert.com.
Dilbert is still a sheep. He says to The Boss, "A lab accident turned me into a sheep." Dilbert continues, "It's not all bad. In addition to being soft and warm, I never need to form opinions." Dilbert hands The Boss a wool shearer and continues, "If you want some wool, just grab me and start shaving. I'll barely struggle." The Boss responds, "Cool!"
Boss: I used to form my own opinions about current events. Now I just copy whatever the people I follow on social media say. Dilbert: Where do they get their opinions from? Boss: From something called an algorithm.
Dilbert says, "I can't stop voicing my honest opinions. It's causing problems at work." Doctor says, "According to your medical records, you're an engineer. We classify that as a disease now." Man says, "Gaaa!!! You haven't had your pon farr vaccination." Dilbert says, "Is it warm in here?"
Boss: I want your honest opinions on my plan. Don't hold back anything. Asok: Does he mean that? Wally: Why don't you find out? Asok: Yes, I have some feedback. Your plan reminds me of what happens when a monkey eats a fermented fruit. He's all - ooh - ooh - ooh and then he falls out of the tree. ... Is that how he looks when he hears honesty? Wally: Beats me. I've never tried it.
Boss: Why don't you change this box to say "virtual"? Dilbert: Because I don't want it to look like it was written by an ignorant blob in an ugly wool suit. You probably shouldn't put your suggestions in the form of questions.
Tags #bluetooth, #bluetooth headset, #cyborg, #doctors, #ear, #full human, #happiness, #intraocular lenses, #inventions, #pill form, #powered by chemistry, #streaming video, #surgically enbed, #vision correction, #dentits, #special surgery, #psychology
Dilbert: I know I'd be happier as a cyborg than a full human. I want you to surgically embed a bluetooth headset in my ear, powered by my own body chemistry. And I'd like intra-ocular lenses with vision correction and streaming video over bluetooth. Doctor: Happiness only comes in pill form.
Dilbert and the Boss stand in the lab. The Boss asks, "Are you telling me that your automatic denture invention mistook Johnson for a meat loaf?" Dilbert replies, "Yeah . . . Last April. I guess I should have told somebody." The Boss covers his face with his hands. Dilbert asks, "Is there a form I need to fill out?"
Dilbert and an executive sit at a table eating lunch. The executive says, "I have these lunches to find out what the workers are thinking. You may speak freely." Dilbert says, "Okay . . . It seems like the company is lacking leadership and direction. The executives squelch all initiative by punishing those who take risks and voice opinions." The executive puts some food on his fork and says, "You leave me little choice but to fling this au gratin potato at your forehead."
At Dogbert's nomination hearings, a member of the Senate Judiciary Committee asks Dogbert, "Do you have any opinions on the right to privacy?" Dogbert replies, "No. In fact, I've never formed an important opinion in my entire life." The senator says, "You must think we're idiots." Dogbert replies, "Okay, I've formed ONE opinion . . . But that's all."