Morons On Parade Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

49 Results for Morons On Parade

View 1 - 10 results for morons on parade comic strips. Discover the best "Morons On Parade" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags morons on parade, magazine, cover story, writer, interview

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: I'm a writer for 'Morons on Parade' magazine. Do you mind if I ask you some questions? The Boss: okay...but only if you promise to not make me look bad. Dogbert: cover story!!! Woo-Hoo!!! The boss: Really?

Dilbert Characters

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags look like moron, magazine cover, misquote, morning on parade, quotes area ccuarte, writers

View Transcript

Transcript

Carol: You made the cover of 'Morons on Parade'. The boss: I hope they didn't misquote me so Id look like a moron. writers do that sometimes. Phew! all the quotes are accurate,

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags conversation, huge head, parade float, pasty skin, communication, over rated

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: I just noticed you head is huge. Alice: I never noticed it before, but now all I see is a parade float made out of pasty skin. Dilbert: Communication is overrated. Dogbert: I'm feeling that right now.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags ratbert, Dogbert, footsteps, demagogue, book, unmarried, Men, scum, successful, write, hate, disguised, science, moles, morons, underground, movement

View Transcript

Transcript

Ratbert says to Dogbert, "I'm following in your footsteps so I can be a demagogue too." Ratbert continues, "Your book 'Unmarried Men are Scum' was so successful that I decided to write my own hate book disguised as science!" Ratbert holds up a manuscript and continues, "I call it 'Moles are Morons.'" Three moles wearing sunglasses sneak up behind Ratbert. Dogbert asks, "Were you aware that moles have a strong underground movement?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags stick to script, act sincere, forgive you, worng, sell key boards, morons, dumber than squirrels, good writing

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss stands in front of a camera and Dogbert sits in a director's chair. Dogbert hands the Boss a script and says, "Stick to the script. Act sincere and beg your customers to forgive you." The Boss looks into the camera and reads, "It was wrong for us to sell keyboards with no 'Q.' We're sorry. We're morons." Dilbert and Dogbert sit on the couch watching the Boss's television commercial. In the advertisement, the Boss says, "We're dumber than squirrels. We hear voices and do what they command. I have broccoli in my socks." Dilbert says, "Good writing." Dogbert responds, "Thanks."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags terrible news, valuable porject, three morons, assigned, crush them, carl, nothing valauable, shoo shoo

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert lies on the couch with his knees bent and Dogbert sits on the backrest. Dilbert says, "Terrible news: my boss assigned me to a fun and valuable project." Dogbert says, "Uh-oh. That means at least three morons will be assigned to similar projects. You must find them and crush them . . ." Dilbert says, "Exactly." Back at the office, Dilbert enters a co-worker's cubicle and says, "Carl, old buddy, whatcha workin' on these days?" Carl waves his hands and says, "Nothing fun and valuable. Shoo shoo!!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, cult, connotation, morons, lives, armchair, bad things

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I think you've taken your cult idea too far." Dogbert sits in a chair with a crown on his head. Dogbert asks, "Who says it's a cult?" Dilbert replies, "YOU said it's a cult!" Dogbert says, "That word has a bad connotation." Dogbert says, "I prefer to think of it as a bunch of morons who have nothing better to do with their lives."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, wallet, money, rich, return, owner, honest, sam grooper, ruthless, criminal, divorced, wife, ruth, reward, expected, slap, scram, gun, morons

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Dogbert walk on the sidewalk. Dilbert points ahead of them and says, "Look, Dogbert - a wallet." Dilbert bends down, picks up the wallet and says, "It's full of money." Dogbert shouts, "We're rich!!" Dilbert says, "We must return it to its owner." Dogbert shouts, "We're honest!" Dilbert says, "His business card says 'Sam Grouper, ruthless criminal.'" Dilbert says, "Let's hope 'ruthless' means he divorced his wife named Ruth." The criminal answers his door with a gun in his hand. Dilbert says, "Mr. Grouper, we found your wallet. No reward is expected." Sam points the weapon at Dilbert and says, "Hand it over. Give me your wallet too, then slap yourselves around and scram." Dilbert's glasses are bent and his clothes are disheveled. Dogbert holds his hands up and says, "We're morons!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags boss, coincidence, fallen under spell, morons, must, pay inexperienced strangers

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally tells Dilbert, "Our boss has fallen under the spell of a consultant." The Boss walks by with his arms outstretched and a zombie-like look on his face. He says, "Must . . . Make assumptions." The Boss continues, "Must . . . write . . large checks to consultant . . . because . . . employees . . . are . . . morons." Wally says, "Just because we pay inexperienced strangers to tell us how to do our jobs, that doesn't mean we're morons!" Dilbert says, "Yeah! It's a coincidence."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dogbert, masterpiece, Dilbert, discovered, art, form, brilliant, considered, abstract, expression, inner, feelings, gullible, morons

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits at the table drawing on a piece of paper. He thinks, "Another masterpiece." Dilbert asks, "What are you doing, Dogbert?" Dogbert replies, "I discovered a highly efficient art form." Dogbert explains, "I've brilliantly combined the simplicity of charcoal with the simplicity of abstract expression." Dogbert continues, "The secret is to let your deepest inner feelings guide the charcoal." Dilbert looks at a drawing and says, "Inner feelings?! What inner feelings? These are scribbles." Dilbert continues, "All I see here is that a cynical dog thinks art buyers are a bunch of gullible morons." Dogbert says, "Wow! I nailed that one!"